2009 Illinois Bloggers Conference
Friday May 8, 2009
Downers Grove, IL
FREE FOR BLOGGERS!
I may be there, too, if I can manage it. Hope to see you there!
posted by Mr. Right at
5/03/2009 06:40:00 PM
Sunday, May 03, 2009
I may be there, too, if I can manage it. Hope to see you there!
Sunday, April 26, 2009
1 Year Ago Today...
May 24, 1931 - Apr 27, 2008
Rest in peace, Dad.
We miss you.
posted by Mr. Right at
4/26/2009 11:59:00 PM
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Presenting: The No Suck Blog Award!
I hereby award this totally non-sucky No Suck Badge Award to IMAO and Bad Example.
Why? Because I feel like it! Do not question me again, peon, or you shall feel my mighty wrath!
All hail Frank J., Harvey and Basil!
And a nostalgic shout out to spacemonkey, Laurence Simon, Cadet Happy, RightWingDuck, the beautiful SarahK, and yes, even to you, Aquaman, wherever you may be!
Nuke the moon!
Nominations for future recipients gladly accepted. Winners must meet minimum no suck standards. Void where prohibited by the evil left wing fascist free speech police.
Two flavors now available for your sidebars:
230 x 230
190 x 190
Choose and perish!
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UPDATE:
I figured I'd go ahead and present my very, very close friends at America is an Obamanation! one these puppies as well. What can I say? "Rev." Right and I are very close. Be sure to check out his blog sometime.
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UPDATE #2 (4/11/09):
It seems Harvey has accepted my offering on behalf of IMAO and has given me back this:
Now, if I can only figure out how to get the sidebar on this old version of Blogger to accept images once again (it doesn't seem to want to cooperate), I can add another pointless graphic to MY sidebar!
Let's see, what can I say?
You don't hate me! You really, really kind of don't hate me! Wow! I'd like to thank me, without whom none of this would have been possible. Everyone else can go suck a lemon. I don't need you anyway, look how great I am! Bugger off...
Wait! Come back, I'm just kidding. No, really, get lost. You'd only eat all my Cheetos and drink all my Mr. Pibb, then wipe your orange hands and face on my curtains when I wasn't looking and ruin all the tables by not using coasters anyway. You people make terrible house guests. Really, go away now before I get angry and turn the hose on you. That would be ugly. Nobody needs to see that, so go.
posted by Mr. Right at
4/09/2009 02:06:00 AM
Monday, March 16, 2009
Finger Lickin' Good!
Michelle Malkin is having a photoshop contest for "Obama Fingers" based on the ridiculous German frozen food concept pictured below. (Yes, they're real!)
Anyway, here's my entry (click on it for a better look):
You can see the others HERE.
Anyway, here's my entry (click on it for a better look):
You can see the others HERE.
Labels: Humor
posted by Mr. Right at
3/16/2009 11:57:00 PM
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Democrats Draft Legislation to "Retire" Illinois Senate Seat in Honor of Barack Obama
Democrats in Congress were scrambling Tuesday to find a way to put an end to a new controversy swirling around Senator Roland Burris (D-IL). It now seems that the man who was recently appointed by former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich (Impeached Crook-Chicago) to fill the Senate seat vacated by Our Lord and Savior, President Barack Hussein Obama, may have lied under oath about discussing payment for said seat with the Governor's brother. Unable to trust the voters of Illinois to do the right thing and elect yet another liberal Democrat with the proper skin pigmentation to fill the hallowed seat in any special election that may yet result from the scandal, a proposal was made, instead, to have the seat permanently "retired" to honor The King of All Unicorns. The idea quickly picked up unanimous support among Democrats everywhere.
Not content to simply leave it at one seat, however, Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA) soon put forth an even bolder proposal, "Just as Major League Baseball retired Jackie Robinson's uniform number for every team in honor of his breaking the sport's color barrier, we, too, must follow their example and retire one Senate seat from all fifty states in honor of President Obama's historic achievement in breaking the most important color barrier of all," she said in a speech from the Senate floor Tuesday.
"Here's how it will work," Senator Boxer explained. "Any state with two Democrats serving, other than Illinois, of course, will have both seats grandfathered in until one or the other Senator dies, voluntarily retires, or loses re-election, at which time the first such seat in each of those states to become vacated would be immediately and irrevocably 'retired' in honor of President Obama. In states which have one Senator from each party, the Republican seat would be immediately retired and in states represented by two Republicans, a panel of Senate Democrats will decide which one we dislike the least and retire the other one's chair forthwith."
"Think of the money we are going to save the American taxpayer by eliminating half the Senators," said Senate Budget Committee Chairman Kent Conrad (D-ND). "Half the salaries, half the expense accounts, half the staffs, half the perks... the savings could feasibly be expected to reach hundreds of millions of dollars annually. Why, you'd have to be a fiscally irresponsible nitwit NOT to support this idea!"
To celebrate this newly discovered windfall, the bill would also immediately quadruple the annual salaries, expense accounts, staffs and perks for all the remaining Senators, including those protected by the grandfather clause.
"What about the retired seats?" One reporter asked at a hastily assembled Senate press conference, "Do we just simply make do with fewer votes in the Senate for each bill?"
"The legislation has been crafted in such a way, that all the retired seats would still be allowed to vote in perpetuity in a way that most reflects the wishes of President Barack Obama," said a smiling Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY). "This would presumably be accomplished during his lifetime with a simple phone call, email or text message whenever necessary. The method for determining his wishes on any particular piece of legislation after his passing would be a bit trickier, but the bill does provide several hundred billion dollars in annual funding for Ouija Boards, crystal balls and a team of professional mediums to be screened, selected and appointed by the NAACP, Operation PUSH, the Congressional Black Caucus, MoveOn.org and the Democratic National Committee."
Reaction from opponents was swift and vocal, but those in favor of it were eager to defend the move.
"Any and all objections to this landmark proposal are, of course, strictly motivated by racism," said NAACP spokesperson Phyllis Whitt-Dredd. "Fortunately the legislation will outlaw all future dissent over anything supported by the Barack Obama Seats as a prosecutable hate-crime."
The bill also immediately "retires" the chair of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas in honor of the man who formerly held his seat, Justice Thurgood Marshall, who said through his NAACP appointed medium, Miss Claire Voyant, "I am truly honored and touched by this gesture. This is the greatest day of my afterlife. Oh, and I declare this bill fully and completely constitutional!"
Also attached to the bill is the Pelosi-Reid Amendment, which changes the legal definition of "bipartisanship" to "legislation crafted with input from Democrats in both the House AND Senate."
According to a statement issued minutes ago, Republicans Arlen Specter (PA), Olympia Snowe (ME) and Susan Collins (ME) have agreed to support the bill "in the spirit of political cooperation and racial harmony as well as an irrational but all-consuming fear of being glared at menacingly by certain members of the mainstream media and our Democrat colleagues if we fail to obey their every command."
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Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
Not content to simply leave it at one seat, however, Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA) soon put forth an even bolder proposal, "Just as Major League Baseball retired Jackie Robinson's uniform number for every team in honor of his breaking the sport's color barrier, we, too, must follow their example and retire one Senate seat from all fifty states in honor of President Obama's historic achievement in breaking the most important color barrier of all," she said in a speech from the Senate floor Tuesday.
"Here's how it will work," Senator Boxer explained. "Any state with two Democrats serving, other than Illinois, of course, will have both seats grandfathered in until one or the other Senator dies, voluntarily retires, or loses re-election, at which time the first such seat in each of those states to become vacated would be immediately and irrevocably 'retired' in honor of President Obama. In states which have one Senator from each party, the Republican seat would be immediately retired and in states represented by two Republicans, a panel of Senate Democrats will decide which one we dislike the least and retire the other one's chair forthwith."
"Think of the money we are going to save the American taxpayer by eliminating half the Senators," said Senate Budget Committee Chairman Kent Conrad (D-ND). "Half the salaries, half the expense accounts, half the staffs, half the perks... the savings could feasibly be expected to reach hundreds of millions of dollars annually. Why, you'd have to be a fiscally irresponsible nitwit NOT to support this idea!"
To celebrate this newly discovered windfall, the bill would also immediately quadruple the annual salaries, expense accounts, staffs and perks for all the remaining Senators, including those protected by the grandfather clause.
"What about the retired seats?" One reporter asked at a hastily assembled Senate press conference, "Do we just simply make do with fewer votes in the Senate for each bill?"
"The legislation has been crafted in such a way, that all the retired seats would still be allowed to vote in perpetuity in a way that most reflects the wishes of President Barack Obama," said a smiling Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY). "This would presumably be accomplished during his lifetime with a simple phone call, email or text message whenever necessary. The method for determining his wishes on any particular piece of legislation after his passing would be a bit trickier, but the bill does provide several hundred billion dollars in annual funding for Ouija Boards, crystal balls and a team of professional mediums to be screened, selected and appointed by the NAACP, Operation PUSH, the Congressional Black Caucus, MoveOn.org and the Democratic National Committee."
Reaction from opponents was swift and vocal, but those in favor of it were eager to defend the move.
"Any and all objections to this landmark proposal are, of course, strictly motivated by racism," said NAACP spokesperson Phyllis Whitt-Dredd. "Fortunately the legislation will outlaw all future dissent over anything supported by the Barack Obama Seats as a prosecutable hate-crime."
The bill also immediately "retires" the chair of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas in honor of the man who formerly held his seat, Justice Thurgood Marshall, who said through his NAACP appointed medium, Miss Claire Voyant, "I am truly honored and touched by this gesture. This is the greatest day of my afterlife. Oh, and I declare this bill fully and completely constitutional!"
Also attached to the bill is the Pelosi-Reid Amendment, which changes the legal definition of "bipartisanship" to "legislation crafted with input from Democrats in both the House AND Senate."
According to a statement issued minutes ago, Republicans Arlen Specter (PA), Olympia Snowe (ME) and Susan Collins (ME) have agreed to support the bill "in the spirit of political cooperation and racial harmony as well as an irrational but all-consuming fear of being glared at menacingly by certain members of the mainstream media and our Democrat colleagues if we fail to obey their every command."
********************
Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
posted by Mr. Right at
2/17/2009 12:39:00 PM
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Media Votes to Expel Rod Blagojevich from Democrat Party
By unanimous vote, representatives from all major American media organizations unceremoniously stripped former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich of his Democrat party affiliation late Thursday following his removal from office by the Illinois State Senate on corruption charges.
The expulsion is immediate and retroactive and forbids any member of the journalism community from ever again identifying Rod Blagojevich as a Democrat on air or in print, under penalty of professional decertification and a wicked swirly in the men's john at an undisclosed highway rest stop.
"I think it goes without saying that we would like to forget he was ever mistakenly referred to as a member of our party," stated Libby Slater, spokesperson for the 'politically unaffiliated' Journalists Against Conservative Killjoys Allied in Support of Socialism (JACKASS). "In fact, we have issued an edict demanding that all evidence of such an unwelcome association be tracked down and stricken from the record. This includes all archived video, audio, print and electronic media references to Mr. Blagojevich over the last 20 years. Luckily, since this latest scandal began, hardly anybody's been mentioning his so-called party affiliation anyway, just out of precaution."
No word yet and whether or not they will take the cruel and unusual step of officially re-branding him a "Republican."
(Developing...)
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Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
posted by Mr. Right at
1/29/2009 11:59:00 PM
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Newly Redesigned "Welcome to Illinois" Road Signs Unveiled
In honor of our state's latest achievement, we thought they could use some tweaking...
Ain't they just (im)peachy?
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Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
Ain't they just (im)peachy?
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Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
posted by Mr. Right at
1/10/2009 01:25:00 AM
Sunday, December 14, 2008
The Right Place Exclusive: Shocking "Foot"age of Bush Shoe Attack!
Soon to rival the Zapruder Film in the annals of American history, The Right Place presents a quick look at some still photographs lifted from an exclusive film we have obtained of the shockingly vicious attack purportrated on our President Sunday in Iraq...
As you can see, the thrown shoes (2 of them in succession) fortunately missed the President, but only by "a couple of feet" according to witnesses.
The FBI and Secret Service have expressed interest in interviewing the following individuals in connection with Sunday's attack on the President. They are to be considered footed and extremely dangerous!
Random Task, professional henchman. Last known whereabouts: Gray-Bar Hotel, Orange County, CA, USA.
Dr. Evil, criminal mastermind. Last known whereabouts: Secret Volcano Lair.
Al Bundy, weapons dealer. Last known whereabouts: A couch in Chicago.
If you any have information about the incident or the three individuals above, please do not call the authorities as they are notorious for lacking a sense of humor and are likely to toss your sorry butt in jail!
********************
Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
As you can see, the thrown shoes (2 of them in succession) fortunately missed the President, but only by "a couple of feet" according to witnesses.
The FBI and Secret Service have expressed interest in interviewing the following individuals in connection with Sunday's attack on the President. They are to be considered footed and extremely dangerous!
Random Task, professional henchman. Last known whereabouts: Gray-Bar Hotel, Orange County, CA, USA.
Dr. Evil, criminal mastermind. Last known whereabouts: Secret Volcano Lair.
Al Bundy, weapons dealer. Last known whereabouts: A couch in Chicago.
If you any have information about the incident or the three individuals above, please do not call the authorities as they are notorious for lacking a sense of humor and are likely to toss your sorry butt in jail!
********************
Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
posted by Mr. Right at
12/14/2008 10:55:00 PM
