I'm as corny as Kansas in August,
I'm as normal as blueberry pie.
No more a smart little (boy) with no heart,
I have found me a wonderful guy!
I am in a conventional dither,
With a conventional star in my eye.
And you will note there's a lump in my throat
When I speak of that wonderful guy!
Yes, folks, Mr. Right is in love!
No, not the mushy, kissy kind of love, but the sort of love you feel when you wake up and find a beautiful, brightly wrapped present beneath your Christmas tree, the very sort of thing you always wanted, deposited there by Santa Claus himself! The best part? I find a new one there just about every day! That is why I have fallen head over heels for my own personal Santa Claus!
Howard, I love you! No, really, I do! Don't ever leave me, don't you dare! Keep on being who you are forever and ever!
I can't believe the Democrats gave the Republicans this lovable, feisty little man to shower us with gift after gift, day in and day out! How unselfish of you guys! I never knew you cared so much! Why, at this rate, I am going to wake up the day after Election Day 2006 and find the greatest present of all under my tree: A filibuster-proof Senate majority! Oh, Howard, please say you'll deliver it for me? No, wait! I want it to be a surprise! Just keep doing everything exactly as you are!
And Howard... I love you!
HT on USAT article: Alex at PoliPundit
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