Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Captions Outrageous! Winners [Totally Busted Edition]

Announcing the winners of the 3rd Right Place Photo Caption Contest of Season Two!

Thank you to one and all who participated!

As expected, an especially good one! Sorry this wasn't up yesterday, but I was too tired last night to give it the attention it deserved so that it could be judged in a fair and efficient manner.

Presenting the top 30 captions for this picture from Igor Khodzinskiy via Sun-Sentinel.com.



HONORABLE MENTION:

-- Susan MacDougal's hard work and stoic silence paid off with one of the finest abstract soap sculpures a federal prisoner had ever produced.

Beerme


-- Venus de My, Oh My, Oh My.

charles austin


-- More proof that there is not a fetish out there that can't be found on the internet.

-- Because of the insufficient amount of stone to complete Senator Clinton’s calves and thighs, the artist stuck to portraying her less noticeable qualities.

-- Following the Democrat mantra of gun control, Hillary has set an example by disarming herself first.

Dr. Phat Tony


-- The maquette for the fifth face on Mt. Rushmore was unveiled, reviled... and re-veiled!

Greg Finnegan


-- Hillary Clinton to star in an updated version of the film A Farewell to Arms.

John Ruberry


-- Hillary finally finds a way to be rid of her fat a**!

Rodney Dill


-- An artist captured in stone an image of the only breasts that were not fondled in the Clinton White House.

Stephen Macklin


-- When Giuliani was Mayor, this trash was kept out of NYC museums!

the man


-- Hillary sues the Museum of Sex for making her bust look too feminine.

-- After years of trying to get Bill to put her there, Hillary is finally put on a pedestal.

Pam


-- A fitting example of Hillary's personality: Stone Cold.

RFA


-- Keyword search: Mature, Nostril-Fetish, Pencil-Necked, Dominatrix, Cattle-Futures, 2008

-- And then our hero, Perseus, whilst viewing his quarry with his brazen shield, did hold up a looking glass, whereby the monster beheld her own gaze...

Steve O


-- Next on Nightline: A surgically-enhanced Hillary Clinton looks toward a run for the Presidency with newfound confidence.

T.M.


-- Animal rights activists in the northeast have been replacing salt licks with hideous statues like this one to scare the deer away from hunting areas.

-- H.R. Giger's original concept for the Alien Queen was too frightening for mainstream movie-goers.

-- This hideous figurehead adorned the prow of Lord Nelson's flagship, and is believed to be responsible for frightening the French Fleet into scuttling their own ships at the Battle of Trafalgar.

V the K


-- Medusa, shorn of her snakes.

walrus


THE TOP TEN:

#10: Thus was the Dark Queen defeated, as Raistlin cast a spell which turned even the depths of Hell to impregnable stone...

Steve O


#9: What Natalie Maines keeps on her piano.

walrus


#8: Victoria's Secret blamed their bankruptcy on "those butt ugly discount mannequins our idiot management bought."

V the K


#7: The Hall of Shame announces it's first inductee.

walrus


#6: The artist said he had no trouble getting former President Carter to pose in his mansiere.

Dave E.


#5: (To the tune of "Bette Davis Eyes")

♫ And with a look she'll seize you
She'll unease you
All the better just to freeze you
She's precocious, and she says just
What it takes to make a pro blush
All the boys think she's heavyweight
She's got Jimmy Carter's face ♫

Greg


#4: "I dreamt I was President in my Maidenform Bra."

Doc


#3: Even Hillary was not immune to the stare of Helen Thomas.

walrus


#2: So the Lord struck down those cities and the entire plain, including all those living in the cities — and also the vegetation in the land. But Lot's wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt... with Jimmy Carter's face and honkers. --- Genesis 19:25-26

V the K


And the winning entry for this Caption Contest...


#1: The newly discovered "Uranus de Milo".

walrus


THE BIG BONUS!!!

(To the tune of "Killer Queen")

♫ She keeps Murdoch and McCain in her White House Cabinet
'It takes a village' she says
She's a card-carrying socialist
No built-in remedy for Fonda or Kennedy
And anytime an invitation you should decline
Cankles and a shrill voice we must have a better choice
Extr'ordinarily vile

We must stop Hillary by any means necessary
Dynamite or a lazer beam
Guaranteed to blow her mind
Please do not elect her twice
Her bark is worse than her bite wanna try?

To avoid complications
Bill never met a woman he didn't like
In conversation she spoke like an aging dyke
Met a man from Arkansas broke a major real-estate law
Then again incidentally if she's that way inclined (can you say Whitewater?)
Support came naturally from Paris (naturally)
For the Senate she couldn't care less
Deceptive yet precise

We must stop Hillary by any means necessary
Dynamite or a lazer beam
Guaranteed to blow her mind
Please do not elect her twice
Her bark is worse than her bite wanna try?

Change of a poll she's as willing as a vascillating John Kerry
Then momentarily not a liberal
Temporarily not far Left
To absolutely drive Sheehan wild - wild
She wants the White House

We must stop Hillary by any means necessary
Dynamite or a lazer beam
Guaranteed to blow her mind
Please do not elect her twice
Her bark is worse than her bite wanna try?

Wanna try ♫

Damian G.


Bravo! Bravo!

Encore! Encore!

ONGOING:
Captions Outrageous! [Havana Good Time, Glad You're Not Here Edition]

Enjoy!


PREVIOUS SEASON TWO PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST WINNERS:

Dissenting Opinion Edition
White Raspbeary Edition

PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST REWIND, Season One #3:

Things Are Looking Up Edition

Right Place Photo Caption Contest Hall of Glory

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