Merry New Year!

Billy Ray: Merry New Year!
Beeks: That's "happy." In this country we say "Happy New Year."
Billy Ray: Oh, ho, ho, thank you for correcting my English which stinks!

Christmas MSNBC Entertainment Nugget

So Joe reporter is in Palestine doing his reporting thing. People have been killing each other and he's all serious. The Blonde at the newsdesk waits for him to finish his report and asks*, "So, apart from a cessation of violence, what could help boost tourism?"

The reporter was speechless. I nearly fell out of my chair.

But I started thinking about it, perhaps "a cessation of violence" from Hammas/Fatah/Insert Terrorist Group Here is too lofty a goal? Terrorism and Tourism are remarkably similarly spelled. Why, both words begin with "T" and end in "rism". Both have consonants and vowels in there. Perhaps the Demorats have a point, after all Tourism isn't bad. Perhaps Terrorism isn't so bad either. What are some other things that could stimulate tourism to the middle east?

• A Popcorn Stand on each streetcorner dispensing free buckets
• Free Fudge (Terrorist Fudge)
• Terrorist Bobblehead Dolls (collect 'em all!)
• Free Skinless (pork free) Hotdogs for each IED detonated
• A panel of judges scoring each "hit" 2-10

The possibilities are endless... Personally I'd like to see a Disney themed park with giant terrorists and martyrs dressed up like Goofy or Mickey or better yet, Mayor McCheese!. They could have a daily parade. If the Pirates of the Carribean can have one why not Hammas?

* I am not making this up

The Christmas Wreath: Holiday Decoration, or Abusive Substance?

Meet the new face of terror.

With just one shopping day left before the Fat Man visits all the world's chillens, there is a new problem facing the Nation's youth: Christmas wreaths.

Known on the street as "yule crack," "St. Nick's hits" and "E" (for evergreen), children as young as six months appear to be "getting off" on the festive fumes.

"I just can't get enough of the stuff," said Billy Johnson, age 13. "It just smells so good. It's, like, addictive, or something!"

"Oh, yeah. I use the stuff all the time around the holidays. Before breakfast, after school... But not during school. They don't allow Christmas wreaths," admits Holly Webster, age 17.

"MMM! Cookies!" concluded Suzy Collins, age 2.

But children and teens aren't the only ones affected. Older Americans are also finding themselves on the tinsel train to wreath whoredom.

"I admit that I like to take the occasional whiff of wreath, but I can quit any time I want," declared Agatha Pederson, age 76. "Just give me another hit! I NEED SOME GOD DAMNED WREATH!"

Some addicts have begun to carry small amounts of wreath with them, concealed in rolled-up papers called "wreathers." Blue Öyster Cult has yet to write a song about the subject.

Since this is a recent phenomenon, it is unknown what the long-term effects of extended wreath abuse entail, but users have shown an increase in carolling, holiday cheer and chronic diarrhoea.

John P. Walters, Director of the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy, has launched an investigation into the possible impact excessive nasal consumption of Christmas wreath, as well as into prolonged exposure to menorah and kinara candle light and the recent increase of tongue-stickings to Festivus poles.

We've Lost the War in Iraq!

Go visit A Soldiers Perspective and see what this is all about.

A rare serious post

From Stew? Tell me it ain't happening.

I read today of a disturbing news event. The Palestinian Prime Minister was stopped trying to enter Gaza with $35 million dollars in cash. Israel shut down the terminal to deny entry for the Palestinian PM.

Reports said Mr Haniyeh, from the Hamas movement, was carrying $35m (€26.5m, £17.8m) in cash, believed to be part of the $350m he raised during a regional tour that took in Iran, Syria and Qatar. He was later allowed entry, but without the cash.

Now what would he be doing with all that cash?

1. Taking a "cash bath"
2. Collecting baseball cards rivaling that of Saddam
3. Perhaps McDonalds opened a branch and he's trying to feed the hungry?
4. LAP DANCES FOR EVERYONE!
5. Buying weapons for terrorists

For what use could it be? Probably be hamburgers.

Understandably members of Hamas, trying to protect the integrity of the hamburgers, decided to storm the terminal and act like terrorists.

Said, Mushir al-Masri, a Hamas legislator, the closure “could lead the region to an explosion and the Zionist enemy and its allies will bear the responsibility for the consequences”.

Another Reason To Not Raise Minimum Wage

Not only that, but this article is also another reason why Conservatives should not be worried about the 2008 elections.

The key thought about minimum wage, as well as other "ways the democrats help the lower class," Believe I say, not what I do.

You can't claim that education is your No. 1 priority while pandering to teachers unions. Nor can you fight against international trade when the evidence is clear that it creates wealth and profoundly improves the lives of people in poor countries.

(And, in the short term, trade makes possible all those cheap goods at Wal-Mart that stretch the paychecks of the people the party is supposed to represent.)

Raising the minimum wage? Yes, it will make a lot of people better off -- and it will speed up the process of outsourcing and automation, which will make a lot of other people worse off. Raising the minimum wage is not an economic plan for making the nation more productive; at best, it's a transfer of wealth, and not even the most efficient way of doing that.

But no! We HAVE to raise the minimum wage to $7.50! We have to increase our minimum wages by 45%, while other countries are lowering their wages. That doesn't look like an incentive to outsource at all, does it?

Raising the Minimum wage; A short term political gain, leading to long term Economic failure.

China Tells Citizens To Beware of Pollution

Beijing's Air is becoming hazardous to your health. Read it:

Beijing residents have been warned to stay indoors as the city's pollution index hit its highest level amid the worst conditions since coal-fired power plants kicked into gear for winter.
Every monitoring station in Beijing's urban districts recorded levels of particulates seven times higher than the safety standard, the Beijing environmental protection bureau said.
Sulfur dioxide and carbon monoxide levels, emitted by coal furnaces and cars, were also several times over standards, it said.
"The city environmental protection bureau is alerting citizens to reduce outside activities under such conditions. Frail people or those sensitive to pollution should take measures to protect themselves," it said.
The pollution levels were the worst in the capital since the winter heating season began in early November, when the city fired up its nearly 6,000 coal-fired furnaces, it said.

I thought Al Gore said that Global warming was America's fault for not signing the Kyoto Protocol...

Domination Through Force?

"[Annan] will accuse the administration of trying to secure the United States from terrorism in part by dominating other nations through force, committing what he termed human rights abuses and taking military action without broad international support." - USA Today

Is it wrong that we used force against a group who only understands forceful tactics? The picture may be for hastage-takers, but it's the same for terrorists and violent dictators as well.

I have one thing to say to Annan. You're right Kofi...nobody agreed with us when we invaded Iraq (except the 48 countries who joined). We were wrong, and your peace loving ideal world was right. Now don't let the door hit your ass when you leave.


H/T: Michelle Malkin, and Oleg Volk for the image.

Twas The Night Before Christmas

Twas the night before Non-specific Holiday celebrated in a politically correct manner and all through the Senate and House,
Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse small furry creature with a long tail commonly referred to as the house mouse, one of 38 subspecies of the genus Mus or Mus musculus (Mouse).

Libbo's hopes hung high on rumors that peace in Iraq would magically appear based on nothing but AP articles and that pacifist Iranian leader's street creds,
And the lefties were pacing with visions of impeachment, tax hikes and all of America cowering to terrorists dancing in their heads.

And Teddy the drunk, passed out asleep in his trunk, dreamt of getting off scott free for murder again before the ensuing opening Congressional keynote. But I digress...,

Out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I ran to the window to see what was the matter, for I thought it was Pelosi or Murtha but the man was fatter.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver so wacked out and mean,
I knew in a moment it must be Howard Dean.

So down through the chimney Dean came with a thud.
He was dressed like a politician and looked like a dud.

His clothes were all covered in ashes and soot,
A bundle of the conservative supporters toys on his back he had flung, and he redistributed the wealth starting with the Non-specific Holiday celebrated in a politically correct manner, loot.

His eyes how they twinkled his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses his nose like a cherry (he had obviously been drinking heavily with a Kennedy. Take your pick.).

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the drizzle on his chin was as white as the snow.

Hillary was there too, he she had a broad face and round little belly,
That shook when he she laughed like a bowl full of jelly.

But soon Deany's team gave a whistle
and away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

I heard him exclaim ere he drove out of sight
Happy Democratic House and Senate led Non-specific Holiday celebrated in a politically correct manner to all and to all a redistributed wealth, impeachment for Bush and socially and politically acceptable (as long as you're not a conservative) Good Night!

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeargh!

I'll Bet They Are!

This Reuters headline kind of says it all:

European Socialists eager to work with U.S. Democrats

OPORTO, Portugal (Reuters) - European Socialists promised on Thursday to work to rebuild Europe's strategic alliance with the United States now that the Democrats control Congress after last month's elections.

Socialist leaders attending a meeting of the European Socialist Party pledged that with the Democrats on the rise, strong ties could be renewed with the United States after years of cool relations with Republican George W. Bush.

Howard Dean, chairman of the national committee of the U.S. Democratic Party, is attending the two-day conference together with the leaders of leftist governments of several countries and party leaders from across Europe.

Can't you just feel the surge of excitement and anticipation? The writer at Reuters saved the best for last.

Socrates said Dean's Democrats "should know that they can count on European Socialists" for support.

Puzzling. The Democrats have the support of European Socialists? I can't imagine why that would be the case? On the other hand, haven't they been receiving that support all along?

Isn't there an old joke about socialists, that a socialist is just a Marxist without the homicidal streak.

Jimmah Cahtah

Jimmy Carter the doddering old fool that he is, wrote a book "that Ah didn't wahnt ta write" but "felt it wahs necessary because of the silence ahbout the Palestine/Israel situation.

Basically his premise is that leaders from Israel and Palestine should sit down and "work out their differences".

Afterwards pigs will fly.

These pigs will be loaded with explosives and crash into high rise apartment buildings filled with Joos.

An interview with Achmed Fuq-alsheektard revealed:

Jimmee Carter shows us that even though the hated American Jews will continue to inhabit our rightful lands, there is hope that we, the freedom fighters of Hizbu'llah, can, with Allah's help - find a way to kill more Jews. The hated evil (death to) America(n) people have plenty of riches. Which we will take. And though the infidel doesn't mind eating the flesh of the most unclean animal, we, the freedom fighters of Hizbu'llah can use this unclean animal to attack the Jews in their homes.

Scientists in France assisted members of the Palestine delegation of Pig bombers to inflate the bladders and stomach of the common barnyard pig with a superlight gaseous substance which allows the pigs to achieve a lighter than air state.

Jimmah Carter had no comments on the Pig bombers plans for Jewish destruction and instead chose to stick his head back into his anus. Saying "Ah just feels more comfortable with my head in yonder".

Man, I'm proud to be a Georgia native.

Team GOP's Identity Theft

The group Team GOP has had their name stolen, by Memphis Democrats. Democrats Ophelia Ford and Reginald Tate both recieved $1,000 donations from "Team GOP." John Harvey has three possible theories:

1) The state goofed
2) Ford and Tate's people goofed
or 3) ...something that isn't exactly legal.

Team GOP leader Jeff Ward is denying (with good reason) that Team GOP would donate money to Democrats, let alone Dems as corrupt as the Ford family.

This isn't the only case of Memphis voting irregularities that John has found. On his site, Voting in Memphis, he also discovered that out of the 200,000 oldest people who voted in Shelby County, 7,000 of them are dead. That does not include the number of people who have birthdays in the 1800's or who's birthday is 01/01/01. Harvey also finds that 5,600 voters are registered in multiple places in the state.

The Memphis Ford Machine may have just had their hand caught in the cookie jar.


Also looking at the contributions to Ophelia, look who's names are on the list:
Harold Ford Sr.
Harold Ford Jr. - And here I thought Ford Jr was trying to AVOID being associated with the Corrupt Fords. He gave $1,000, and Ophelia was also the ONLY candidate Ford Jr. donated directly to in Shelby County.

Cross Posted at GOP and College

Truthers Distort Another Tape

Truther's have tried to pull yet another fast "absolute" conclusion without actually analyzing the video to see if their claims are correct. Their claim:

"You can't see a plane, so it had to be a government cover up."

One thing is missing from that statement. You can't see The Pentagon either. I-395 completely blocks the view of the Pentagon from the hotel.

"So what?" you might say, "What's your point?"

I'll explain.

The height of the Pentagon is 77 feet 3.5 inches the entire way around it's perimeter, in all rings. The tail height of a Boeing 757 (while resting on the ground with landing gear down) is 44 feet 6 inches. The pentagon is 32 feet 8 1/2 inches taller than a standing 757, not to mention the fact that the 757 which hit The Pentagon had hit the ground. So the fact that you cannot see The Pentagon means that you will not be able to see a plane either.

If you'll look at this graphic, you can see the camera's view angle in relation to the flight path which 77 took.


By the time the plane had gotten into the field of view of the camera at the hotel, it was already low enough to have clipped/severed the poles on Washington Blvd. Also, note that Washington Boulevard dips BELOW Interstate 395, meaning that Flight 77 could have been even further below the field of view.

Cross posted at GOP and College

An Al Gore Fantasy

Mexican leftists fought tooth and nail - literally - to prevent Felipe Calderon from assuming the presidency after a close election this summer.

MEXICO CITY (Reuters) - Felipe Calderon took power as Mexico's president on Friday in a chaotic ceremony rattled by fist fights in Congress and jeering protests from leftists who claim he stole a July election that sparked months of political unrest.

They claim, but they have no evidence. Just like Florida. And Ohio.

Surrounded by bodyguards, the conservative Calderon slipped into Congress through a back door, quickly declared the oath of office and put on the presidential sash as left-wingers who had vowed to stop him taking office screamed "Get out! Get out!"

He was then rushed out again. The lightning-fast ceremony lasted just four minutes, including the singing of the national anthem, and Calderon was unable to make his inaugural speech.

[...]

Dozens of rival deputies earlier threw punches and chairs at each other and leftists built barricades to block the main doors and try to prevent Calderon from entering the building.

Although Calderon's security team outwitted his opponents in Congress, the brawls underlined Mexico's deep political divide and cast doubt on how successful Calderon can be in ending the unrest that followed his razor-thin election victory.

Although his ultimate concession speech was conciliatory, a fact that probably spared us such infantile theatrics here in the States, the left wing in this country since 2000 has worked overtime, with the aid of a sympathetic press, to prevent President Bush from governing. The only thing that put a halt to the efforts, briefly, was 9/11. They haven't acted like the Mexican spoiled children described above, but their behavior at times hasn't been far from it. Witness Cindy Sheehan, for example.

I think they'll lose it completely, just like their brethren to the south, if the next president isn't named Obama or Clinton.

Captions Outrageous! Winners [Squawk Box Edition]

Attendance was a bit low this week, but there were still some solid entries in this week's Caption Contest.

As a reminder, here is this week's picture:

GOP and College says: "Hey, you wanna play with my little one?"

And now, let's take a look at our winners.

HONORABLE MENTION:
-- "Oh, goody! With the Democrats in power I can partial-birth abort my chick!" – Damien G.

-- "Hate To Complain But The Night Light's Burnt Out." – Radio Free Fred

-- I told you, son, I wasn't in the movie Happy Feet. – Carl

THE TOP TEN:
#10 "You Could Use A Global Worming." – Radio Free Fred

#9 Dad...tell me the story of Steve Irwin again. – Carl

#8 "Is that an offspring or are your feet happy to see me?" – McGehee

#7 "Why can't we have Hamburger Helper like Billy's family?"
"You'll eat regurgitated fish and like it, young man!" – Pam

#6 Bill Clinton unveils his special "Intern" Halloween costume. – Stew

#5 While you're down there, change the oil and rotate the tires. – walrus

#4 Sorry son, Nancy Pelosi took the last fish, said it was our "Contribution". – walrus

#3 "Have You Ever Considered Cental Air?" – Radio Free Fred

#2 "There's Enough Yeast Down Here To Start A Bakery." – Radio Free Fred

And the winning entry:

"Say goodnight, Dick." – Rodney Dill

Previous Winners:

#1 - Dissenting Opinion Edition
#2 - White Raspbeary Edition
#3 - Totally Busted Edition
#4 - Havana Good Time, Glad You're Not Here Edition
#5 - Right Hand to God Edition
#6 - Some Assembly Required Edition
#7 - Mad Hatter Edition
#8 - Chain of Fools Edition
#9 - Beyond Her Grasp Edition
#10 - Make Love, Not Jihad Edition
#11 - Are You There God? It's Me, Hugo Edition
#12 - Wake Up and Smell the Kofi Edition
#13 - I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire Edition
#14 - The Scion, the Witch and the Saprobe Edition
#14 1/2 - The Big Pigture Edition
#14 3/4 - Laid Back Edition
#14 4/5 - Pop A Squat Edition
#14 5/6 - That Ain't Right Edition
#14 6/7 - I'm So Beat Edition

Jesse Jackson, Hero

Greg Finnegan, a reader and all around good guy posted something simply too classic to not be shared. Click for a chuckle.

hastyruminations.blogspot.com

Here's a sample:

After Michael Richards went on Jesse Jackson’s radio show, Jesse had a New Idea.

He will lean on the entertainment and music industries to ban the N-word. NPR reported this morning that Jesse also will ban the “w” word for prostitute, and the “b” word for a female dog.

To avoid constitutional problems, he won’t go for a law. He will simply lean on people to comply. With him.

Michael Richards rants against Black Friday; retailers call for apology.

"I'm fried!"

Michael Richards, famously known as Cosmo Kramer on the popular sitcom Seinfeld, apologised Saturday for spewing hateful epithets during a stand-up comedy act against various big name chains during Black Friday, the busiest shopping day of the year.

"For me to be at a comedy club and flip out and say this crap, I'm deeply, deeply sorry," Richards said. "I don't hate shopping. That's what's so insane about this."

Richards had apparently been in a dispute with WAL*MART and Target over his coffee table book about coffee tables coffee table, which prompted him to yell, "Shut up! Fifty years ago we'd have you upside down with a f------ fork up your a--!"

"Keep that AIDS ribbon away from me!"

Richards also ranted against McDonald's, which refused to sell his ketchup and mustard bottle, Calvin Klein for stealing his beach-smelling cologne idea and the New York Metropolitan Transportation Authority for rejecting his suggestion that the homeless pull rickshaws to cut down on air pollution.

The Side You Don't Hear

I keep hearing about how much of a tragedy it was that the man was shot and killed last week after leaving a NYC club the night before he was to get married. But what about the side of the story that the news keeps leaving out? The part of the story that was in the second paragraph of the WaPo article about it.

The spray of bullets hit the car 21 times, after the vehicle rammed into an undercover officer and then twice into an unmarked New York Police Department minivan, police said.

If the police had not shot the man, he was liable to face asaulting a police officer with a deadly weapon, and any other charges that may have stemmed from ramming the van. The BAC of his body may have shown something as well. Only time will tell though.

The fact is that this man drove his car into a police officer, and if that's not a reason to use force, I don't know what is..

Pravda!

After hearing report after report after report on the terrible sectarian violence in Iraq, NBC News has now made it their policy to call the violence, officially, a "civil war." Never mind that much of the worst violence is perpetrated by non-Iraqi "foreign fighters."

And on 60 Minutes last night, Lara Logan of CBS actually wondered to Gen. John Abizaid exactly how he would be "managing the defeat" in Iraq, of which she seemed completely convinced. To which Gen. Abizaid's response, after he'd recovered from his surprise, was firm.

You have to wonder how much these reporters were relying on information from sources like, say, Captain Jamil Hussein and his ilk. I suspect that a thorough analysis of the sourcing on many of the stories of violence would point directly at these individuals.

Captions Outrageous! [Squawk Box Edition]

March of the Penguins was on the Hallmark Channel tonight, and to honor the little guys, I've decided to use this picture as the *hopefully* last GOPAC Contest.


The contest will last until Wednesday instead of Tuesday. I got a late start since it was Thanksgiving Weekend, and I have been out of town for the holidays.

Captions Outrageous! Winners [I'm So Beat Edition]

Sorry it's late for the announcing of the winners, but I'm in Springfield, MO to visit my mother's parents for Thanksgiving. And I promise, that a new contest will be right up as soon as I can get around to it. But as a Reminder, here is the picture which was used:

GOP and College Says: "That crap Nancy fed me about "You should be House Majority Leader" gave me the runs. Ugh.... "

So let's get on with the winners!

HONORABLE MENTION:
-- "Wahhhhhhhhhhhh!" - Benning

-- Rutgers? RUTGER... Oh wait, they lost. - walrus

-- Pelosi: "Bush gets to pose with a turkey for Thanksgiving, and so do I." - Rodney Dill

-- Aging Betty Boop and Porky Pig do politics. - Doc

-- Even Jack Mutha has trouble adjusting to Pelosi's new low-cut dresses... - Steve O

-- Nancy to John, "If you had gone to my plastic surgeon and gotten rid of that turkey neck, you might have won." - Doc

THE TOP TEN:
#10 "Just go up to your Congressman and say, 'Oops, I crapped my pants!'" - Damien G

#9 "The flags are just props, it's not like I give a rat's ass for this country." - walrus

#8 Murtha: When she said we'd be "in bed together," I thought she was talking about politics... - The Random Yak

#7 Speaker Pelosi basks in victory as the candidate she supported comes in a solid second. - Steve O

#6 Murtha: "Well you won't have me to kick around anymore."
Pelosi: "Good thing we still have John Kerry." - Rodney Dill

#5 Murtha tries to figure out how to "cut and run" from this latest political disaster - er - appearance. - The Random Yak

#4 While Nancy muttered "Should not have had that third bean burrito" to herself, the others quickly learned the meaning of - 'silent but deadly'. - elliot

#3 "Jack, could I use some of the skin from your jowls to even out my face?" - Damien G

#2 "Maybe If I Used The "N" Word I Would Get Some Attention, NUTS! NUTS! NUTS!" - Radio Free Fred


And The Winner:
#1 Pelosi: "Sorry John, as God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly." - Rodney Dill

Thank you players! See you for this week's contest!

Previous Winners:

#1 - Dissenting Opinion Edition
#2 - White Raspbeary Edition
#3 - Totally Busted Edition
#4 - Havana Good Time, Glad You're Not Here Edition
#5 - Right Hand to God Edition
#6 - Some Assembly Required Edition
#7 - Mad Hatter Edition
#8 - Chain of Fools Edition
#9 - Beyond Her Grasp Edition
#10 - Make Love, Not Jihad Edition
#11 - Are You There God? It's Me, Hugo Edition
#12 - Wake Up and Smell the Kofi Edition
#13 - I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire Edition
#14 - The Scion, the Witch and the Saprobe Edition
#14 1/2 - The Big Pigture Edition
#14 3/4 - Laid Back Edition
#14 4/5 - Pop A Squat Edition
#14 5/6 - That Ain't Right Edition

Comic Relief Turns Into Bush Bashing Festival

Maybe it was the incessant "Bush Is An Idiot" Jokes, or the mass "You Suck!" being yelled at a comedian portraying G.W, but something tells me that Comic Relief had less of an emphasis on the Katrina Victims, and more of an emphasis on "How many times can we take cheap shots at Bush?"

On one note, at least they acknowledged that there were government flaws on all levels of government. And as a thought to tickle your brain, if Big Government was to blame for all the mistakes in N.O, then why would you want to vote for Democrats who will only make the Government larger?

Much Ado About Nothing

The Tennessean released a front page article in the Sunday paper about "discrimination in the Navy." The story states that the Navy has a specific number of minority "low mental group" enlistees that it can enlist. If it reaches that number and a minority and a caucasion both apply to enlist, the minority applicant is told to come back next month, and the caucasion applicant is welcomed in. Let's analyze the situation.

The mental aptitude groups are determined by the ASVAB (Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery) test. The test has scores ranging from 0-100, with 100 being a perfect score. The "Low Mental Group"(Cat V) are those who score a 9 or lower on the ASVAB. How well you do on the ASVAB test determines what your job in the military will be. Obviously, those who score high on the ASVAB test would recieve more difficult skilled jobs, and lower scores will be given less skilled work.

However, what The Tennessean fails to mention in the entire article is the fact that there is a limited number of Cat V positions available to enlistees. In order to comply with Equal Oppertunity laws, the Navy HAS to fill a specific number of those positions with Minorities, and the remainder are left to Caucasions. The Tennessean fails to even give a hint at the fact that if the roles are reversed, the minority enlistee will be welcomed in, and the Caucasian enlistee will be the one to hear, "Try us again next month."

In my opinion The Tennessean is making a big story out of nothing.

Weapons of war

Now that the Demorats are in control

The Get Stewed Newsmonger News Team has outdone themselves.

Again!

With the recent elections, Nancy Pelosi and her minions have a tough job. Not only do they have to correct the ethics of the Republicans while somehow minimizing their own rather nasty skeletons in the proverbial closet but they have to figure out some way to fight this war on terror. While redeploying to Okinawa.

Recently it was revealed that the baby killing, evil, hated military industrial complex has a new weapon in the war on terror.

The "Man Wing". Despite the name, this is not something that was originally a practical joke on "The Man Show". It's actually a real product and not a fabrication of my sick mind.

The Gryphon Man Wing is a strap on wing with jet propulsion which allows soldiers to deploy at 30,000 feet and then eject, parachuting directly into the enemy's backyard.

While this is a stunning achievement in the advances in scientific military weaponry, it pales in comparison to the Democratic leaders new ideas.


Nancy Pelosi, John "cut and run" Murtha, Harry Reid and Ted *hic* Kennedy are proud to announce:

The Michael Moore Masticating Machine

You see, Moore will eat ANYTHING. A side of beef, fourteen rotisserie chickens, small children or an entire daycare center, it pretty much doesn't matter.

The Democrats plan will be to ship a clone of Michael Moore to Iraq/Iran/North Korea, wherever he is needed, and give him a "dinner invitation". Moore will then proceed to eat everything in that country. Including the leaders if they're not fast enough.

Peace in the middle east? Send Michael "If you can't beat 'em, eat 'em" Moore.

Captions Outrageous! [I'm So Beat Edition]

I just got word from Mr. Right that until the end of the month, I'll be handling Caption Contest Duties, and fortunately this picture fell in my lap. It comes to us from Reuters vis Yahoo!

So you know the drill, and entries are due Tuesday at 11:59 PM!

Also, I'm not only hosting this caption contest, I'm hosting a contest at GOP and College as well! Be sure that that is your next stop on the web.

Also, we not only love hosting contests, but we enjoy giving our blogger buddies a laugh with our entries in their contests. So please be sure to stop by there as well.

Bagel Blogger (Where I took 2nd Place last week!)
GOP and College
GOP & the City
Gone Rick Motel
Outside the Beltway
Willisms
Wizbang

*********************************

Dear beloved CAPHOGs, I must humbly apologize for shirking my duties lately, but I am afraid that I am going to have to delay my return to the helm of the caption contest for another couple of weeks.

I never intended to be gone so long, but after managing to keep the contest running uninterrupted for 66 straight weeks, a series of unrelated events have been running interference between me and my beloved photo caption contest!

Week 1: I wanted to shorten the time from start to finish of our contests from the ridiculous week and a half it had been running to less than a week, so I asked GOPAC to help out so that I wouldn't have to chose between skipping a week and having two contests to judge while trying to prep my research heavy Congressional ratings post.

Week 2: Blogoweeniversary II, an immense undertaking that also ended up involving my creating a shadow blog and having it ready to roll out just in case Blogger hadn't cleared up a series of technical problems in time for the big event. Once again, GOPAC did a magnificent job of standing in.

Week 3: Instead of spending time on the contest, I felt I could make a more important contribution by working with the GOP GOTV effort. I actually helped out in a rare case of a GOP win in one of the most hotly contested races in the country! Mission accomplished, but a somewhat hollow victory in the end. Again, kudos to GOPAC for saving our contest.

Week 4: Physically and mentally drained, I spent the last week avoiding most things like blogs, talk radio and news in order to avoid becoming some twisted conservative version of a Moonbat, obsessed with losing and angry at the world. After all, there are other things in life. Again, GOPAC to the rescue!

Feeling refreshed, I have begun to once again dip my toes back into the waters, but...

Weeks 5-6: I have now been slapped with a combo of extra hours at work and family obligations on the wrong days... the very days I would normally use to prep and then judge the contest! Aaarrrggghhh!!!

So here is the scoop: I am giving up on November and turning the helm over to GOPAC for the next couple of weeks. I will try, schedule permitting, to return to hosting the contest in December if at all possible. I will return, folks, just not as soon as I'd like!

In the meantime, please continue to support GOP & College and his usual, marvelous job of giving us all a contest to play during my extended absence. I really can't thank him enough for all he has done, and I really can't thank all of you enough for your patience, understanding and razor sharp wits that make our contests so very special!

Mr. Right

********************************
Oh, Mr. Right, you have. (Sorry, I couldn't resist the link-fest.)

Interesting...

So there is myself, GOPAC...and then there's GOPAC.

GOPAC.org is an organization which trains Republican Candidates for elections.

Weird.

Some Cool Stuff I've Misssed...

Hi, all!

I've been taking a little break, but I wanted to pop in and share a couple links to some fun stuff that deserves a look!

First, Pam offers the Al-Jazeera Album of the Year: Jihad Rock!

Next, Buckley tells us how Republicans have learned to embrace the horror!

I'll be back soon. I just needed a little break from blogging, which has now been extended by additional demands on my time. So sorry, but at least my co-bloggers are keeping you informed and entertained in the meantime, and I cannot thank them enough!

Keep the faith!

Captions Outrageous! Winners [That Ain't Right Edition]

Time is up, and the judging is over. Who will be crowned the king of the jokesters this week? We'll find out here shortly. Poor G.W. didn't know what hit him on election day, and his face showed it. Your job was to go inside the head of the president and find out what this picture was really about. And, if your entries were funny enough and we're lucky, maybe, JUST MAYBE, Mr. Right will be back in the saddle of the CAPHOG Contest for season two.

GOP & College says: "What the?...Laura?...Did?...Are?... How?"

Well, let's see who all took honors in this week's contest:

HONORABLE MENTION

-- Expression on Dubya's face when told the 'hanging chads' didn't 'hang' this time. – elliot

-- "No Donald, ya didn't have to ceremonally take off and turn in your suit right now, its your own clothes, not gov't issue." – Rodney Dill

-- So the party loses, I get my amnesty program so I win. Why does this not really bother me? – walrus

THE TOP TEN

#10 President Bush, viewing the Republican road-kill after the election, makes lemonade out of lemons by having a custom jacket made out of Lincoln Chafee's hide. – Pam

#9 Catered party: $3500
Polished off two kegs: $150
Able to piss like a race horse: Priceless – elliot

#8 "I Ain't Felt This Bad Since I Fell Off My Bike and Had a Bucket Full Of Ass Blisters." – radio free fred

#7 Conservatism? Was THAT the missing ingredient? – walrus

#6 Rutgers? RUTGERS??? – walrus

#5 "Can we have a do-over?" – Carl

#4 Whadda mean its not pronounced Nu-cu-lar?- Rodney Dill

#3 What do you mean, "They voted with their middle fingers?" – The Random Yak

#2 I bet ya if we get Hillary a cute intern she'll.... – Bagelblogger

And the Winner

#1 What 'choo talkin' 'bout, Nancy! – The Random Yak

Once again, thank you all for playing, and hopefully we can get back to the official points battles this coming Friday.

Previous Weeks Winners:
#1 - Dissenting Opinion Edition
#2 - White Raspbeary Edition
#3 - Totally Busted Edition
#4 - Havana Good Time, Glad You're Not Here Edition
#5 - Right Hand to God Edition
#6 - Some Assembly Required Edition
#7 - Mad Hatter Edition
#8 - Chain of Fools Edition
#9 - Beyond Her Grasp Edition
#10 - Make Love, Not Jihad Edition
#11 - Are You There God? It's Me, Hugo Edition
#12 - Wake Up and Smell the Kofi Edition
#13 - I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire Edition
#14 - The Scion, the Witch and the Saprobe Edition
#14 1/2 - The Big Pigture Edition
#14 3/4 - Laid Back Edition
#14 4/5 - Pop A Squat Edition

Glenn Beck's Exposed: The Extremist Agenda

If you're not watching CNN Headline News right now, you need to. Glenn Beck is giving an unapologetic look at the extremist Musilms in the Middle East. If you miss the 7 PM ET showing, it will be on again at 9PM ET and Midnight ET.

WATCH IT!

You will be shocked at what the Media has NOT shown you from the Middle East.

Why Can't They All Lose?

In an election one side wins and the other loses. That's the way it is, that's the way it has always been. "None of the above" has never won the most votes ... but maybe it should.

Convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff is scheduled to report to federal prison tomorrow, over the objections of federal prosecutors who say they still need his help to pursue leads on officials he allegedly bribed.

Sources close to the investigation say Abramoff has provided information on his dealings with and campaign contributions and gifts to "dozens of members of Congress and staff," including what Abramoff has reportedly described as "six to eight seriously corrupt Democratic senators."

Six to eight? The pari-mutual window is now open. I've got my money on Senators Reid and Durbin, and of course Senator Menendez. It's kind of hard to quell the suspicion that you're just as corrupt as the gang you pushed out when your Speaker of the House-to-be wants an Abscam figure as majority leader and a former judge impeached and removed for bribery as chairman of the Intelligence Committee.

A Good Thing MSM Will Never Show

Just a reminder of who is on the side of good, and who is on the side of evil in Iraq.

MCCONNELL AIR FORCE BASE, Kan. - All of the attention embarrasses him, but as this Chief Master Sergeant learned recently, a lifetime of caring and good deeds is bound to catch up with you eventually.

Chief Master Sgt. John Gebhardt, superintendent of the 22nd Wing Medical Group here, recently gained worldwide attention for a photo of him holding an injured Iraqi child. The photo was taken about a month ago, while he was deployed to Balad Air Base in Iraq.

The young infant had received extensive gunshot injuries to her head when insurgents attacked her family killing both of her parents and many of her siblings. The chief had a knack for comforting her and they often would catch a cat nap together in a chair.

According to NewsBusters, CNN is the only news agency to have covered this story.

The Left IS Taking Over

It was scary enough for Halloween to fake a Liberal take-over, but if the left has their way, then the scare might be real.

WASHINGTON — After toppling the long-dominant Republicans in a hard-fought election, the Democratic Party's incoming congressional leaders have immediately found themselves in another difficult struggle — with their own supporters.

Some of the very activists who helped propel the Democrats to a majority in the House and Senate last week are claiming credit for the victories and demanding what they consider their due: a set of ambitious — and politically provocative — actions on gun control, abortion, national security and other issues that party leaders fear could alienate moderate voters and leave Democrats vulnerable to GOP attacks as big spenders or soft on terrorism.

The one thing the Dems weren't counting on was the one thing that the GOP had to work with when they gained control before, the fact that the outer reaches claim the victory, and demand reparations.

The thought of Democrats bending over backwards to appeal to the far left fringe is a good thing in my view since many of the Left's ideals are not shared by moderates who will come back to the GOP after the coming 2 years. However, the Democrats may actually legeslate to the fringe of the Left in that time. With announcing San Fransisco's Nanci Pelosi as the candidate for Speaker of the House, Pelosi nominating Jack Murtha as the House Majority Leader, Charlie Rangel as the head of the Ways and Means committe, and Harry Reid as the head of the Ethics committee, the outlook is pretty gloomy for Conservatives in the next 2 years.

We shall have to sit back and see what happens.

Liberal Fact Mixing

"That ('under God') part is sort of offensive to me," student trustee Jason Ball, who proposed the ban, told Reuters. "I am an atheist and a socialist, and if you know your history, you know that 'under God' was inserted during the McCarthy era and was directly designed to destroy my ideology."

I don't see why Ball should be so up tight about the pledge. After all, it was written by socialist Francis Bellamy in 1892.

And to deny that this country was founded by Christian, God Fearing people is just plain wrong. In fact, let's break it down shall we?

Signers of the Declaration of Independence:
All 56 signers of the Declaration of Independence were raised as Christians.

Signers of The Articles of Confederation:
All 48 signers of The Articles of Confederation were raised as Christians.

The Delegates of The Constitutional Convention of 1787 (including the 39 people who signed the United States Constitution)
All 39 signers of the United States Constitution, and the 16 non-signers of the Constitution were raised as Christians.

All 204 people who could be considered "founding fathers," whether they signed the Declaration of Independence, signed the Articles of Confederation, attended the Constitutional Convention of 1787, signed the Constitution of the United States of America, served as Senators in the First Federal Congress (1789-1791), or served as U.S. Representatives in the First Federal Congress were raised in Christian families. Many of them were either ministers, or the children of ministers.

Liberals proclaim that a majority of the Founding fathers were Deists who do not believe in the preachings in The Bible, however, out of the 204 Founding Fathers, only 3 are listed as Deists, and all of them were raised Episcopalian. With this information, how can secular liberals honestly say, "Our country was not founded on Judeo-Christian beliefs?"

Thank You!

HAPPY VETERANS DAY!!!

******************************

More Tributes:

A Rose By Any Other Name

The World According To Carl

And many, many more...

Why Will Franklin Is An Economic Genious

Will (of Willisms) has unearthed things such as his constantly updating Social Security Reform Thursday (55 issues and growing), and especially his 375th Trivia Tidbit, which covers the Bush Tax Cuts which Democrats have long beat the drum of only benefiting the rich. However, as Will points out, the greatest beneficiary was in fact the lower 50% of income makers.
Will uses Jon Kyl's analysis of the Democrat plan to repeal the tax cuts, and with that, they will raise taxes on everyone, except the rich. Will points out that the wealthiest 10% of people have actually paid more taxes with the tax cuts than if the cuts were repealed.
Right now, the top 1% of Americans pay 32.4% of the taxes in the United States (Compared to 32.3% before), the top 5% pay 53.3% (compared to 51.6% before the "cuts") and the top 10% pay 65.7% (compared with 63.6% before). But if the Democrats have their way, then the tax burden of the lowest 50% will increase from 3.4% of the total tax revenue to 4% of the government's tax revenue. If repealed, the lowest 50% of tax payers will have an increase of 17% in their taxes. Here are some other numbers:

According to the Treasury Department, all American taxpayers will experience a tax increase if the 2001 and 2003 tax provisions are not made permanent. On average:

* 115 million taxpayers will see a $1,716 increase.
* 84 million women will see a $1,970 increase.
* 48 million married couples will see a $2,726 increase.
* 42 million families with children will see a $2,084 increase.
* 12 million single women with children will see a $1,062 increase.
* 17 million seniors will see a $2,034 increase.
* 26 million small business owners will see a $3,637 increase.
* More than 5 million low-income individuals and couples will no longer be exempt from individual income tax.

And who is going to head the Ways and Means Committee, and will write our new tax laws? Charles "I love taxes" Rangel.

Captions Outrageous! [That Ain't Right Edition]

OK, OK, I lied when I said Mr. Right would be back this week, so back by popular demand...
ANOTHER GOP AND COLLEGE CAPTION CONTEST!!! Mr. Right has been feeling a bit depressed since Tuesday, and it's our job to cheer him up with your captions. And the winning picture for this week's contest:


What could be going through George's head? I say, Bring it!

And here at The Right Place, we not only host great caption contests, we compete in them too. So jump on over to the other contests around the 'sphere:

Bagel Blogger
Bullwinkle Blog
Cowboy Blob's
Gone Rick Motel (Electric Venom has the same picture)
GOP and the City
Outside The Beltway
Rightlinx.com
Sobekpundit
Willisms (Where GOPAC took 2nd Place last week!)
Wizbang!

And as always, where would we be without Viking's never ending contests at Caption This!

Captions Outrageous! Winners [Pop A Squat Edition]

Announcing the winners of the 14 (and 4/5)th Caption Contest. Mr. Right has vowed to come back in the saddle for the Caption Contests to resume points for the second season of the CAPHOG. So thank you to everyone who competed, and just as a reminder, here was the image that was chosen for the contest.


GOP and College says: *To the tune of "Saturday Night"* D-A-V-I-D Hasselhoff, ROCKS!

And now for the awards!

HONORABLE MENTION:
-- Somehow, the dancers doubted the terrorists' version of "YMCA" would make it as a dance craze. – The Random Yak

-- Kos' Kids keep practicing the Nazi salute - and keep failing miserably, just like everything else they try. – hatless in hattiesburg

-- The first all-Democrat rugby team shows solidarity to jihadists at their intial game..."Our team is red hot, your team will be beheaded"! – Beerme

-- Saddam's jury gives a preview of their coming decision, during an afternoon soccer break. – Beerme


TOP TEN:

#10: The Democratic Party All-Male Cheerleading Squad demonstrate their interpretation of John Kerry's 2008 Presidential hopes by doing their patented "slit your own throat" routine. – Carl

#9: Bill knew that, under the circumstances, no one would be able to pin the fart on him. – Pam

#8: The 2006 Democrats finally get around to revealing their new Homeland Security plan. – walrus

#7: In an attempt to protect themselves from Congressional perverts, House pages have started a rigorous work-out program.- Maggie

#6: It's close to miiiiiiiiiiiiidniiiiiiiiiiiight and somethin' evil's lurkin' in the dark. Under the moooooooooooooooonliiiiiiiiight you see a sight that almost stops your heart. – Greg

#5: "And spank it! And spank it! Two, three, four..." – Damien G.

#4: "I'll take 'Dreams George Michael has had’ for $400, Alex." – V the K

#3: Al Queda training camp for Network News Anchors. – Doc

#2: The Oakland Raiders proudly debuted their new "Chokeleaders" on Monday Night Football. – The Random Yak

And the Winner:
...and now you see what really happens to people who don't do well in school. You get stuck on the New Zealand rugby team." – Carl

Previous Winners:
#1 - Dissenting Opinion Edition
#2 - White Raspbeary Edition
#3 - Totally Busted Edition
#4 - Havana Good Time, Glad You're Not Here Edition
#5 - Right Hand to God Edition
#6 - Some Assembly Required Edition
#7 - Mad Hatter Edition
#8 - Chain of Fools Edition
#9 - Beyond Her Grasp Edition
#10 - Make Love, Not Jihad Edition
#11 - Are You There God? It's Me, Hugo Edition
#12 - Wake Up and Smell the Kofi Edition
#13 - I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire Edition
#14 - The Scion, the Witch and the Saprobe Edition
#14 1/2 - The Big Pigture Edition
#14 3/4 - Laid Back Edition

Why Stay?

Chris Matthews interviewed Howard Dean, and was actually asking Dean to hastefully cut and run. He wasn't even trying to hide it. And thinking about that reminded me of other difficult wars we've fought in the past, and how the choices in those wars affected us today.

There was one war which we were involved in that took the lives of some 25,000 Americans, and lasted nearly 8 years. The United States could have just given up after 4, and been done with it. America ciuld have bowed down to the enemy and gone on with their own lives. Battle after battle in the war weakened the morale of the soldiers, but they kept on pushing, because they knew the end justified the means.

There was another war, that lasted 4 bloody years, and took the lives of over 200,000 United States Citizens. From teenagers, to retirees, this war was far and away one of the worst things that America has ever had to face. And at the time, the newly elected President had to decide what was best for the country. To keep fighting through the death and the toil, or to run back home, and throw in the towel.

The first war gave us the greatest thing we have, The United States of America. Up until the battle of Saratoga in 1777, the United states could never seem to win a key battle. Then It happened. The British were defeated, at Saratoga, and morale for the Americans grew. More and more men joined the fight to become a soveriegn nation, and because of determination, they succeeded.

The next war kept this country together. Republican Abraham Lincoln came into office with a divided nation, and less than a month after he took the oath, Ft. Sumter was fired upon. The war was seen by many as going to be quick, and painless. People even would sit on their lawns and watch the battles from afar for entertainment. But as the toll grew, and the weeks turned into months, then the months turned into years. What would have happened if Lincoln and the rest of the United States had just given up and left?

Why stay? Because the end justifies the means.

Cross Posted at: GOP and College

Hot Air Straw Poll

Provided by Hot Air!

600,000 or 150,000?

First there was the infamous study by Lancet that stated that there have been 655,000 excess deaths in Iraq since 2003, but an Iraqi official has come out stating that a closer estimate is about 150,000. Granted that is more than expected, but it is less than 1/4 the outrageous amount that had been previously estimated.

That number was actually based on body counts, not interviews, and included civilians, police, as well as the many people who had been abducted, maimed, tortured, and beheaded by Iraqi insurgents.

Turning Around The Economy

Pelosi was right when she said the Democrats would turn around the economy. Check this out.

NEW YORK (AP) -- Wall Street's three-day winning streak came to an end Thursday as investors, taking a second look at Tuesday's election results, questioned whether a Democratic Congress would be friendly to business.
The losing session, which was also influenced by rising oil prices and a drop in consumer confidence, was to be expected after three days of gains that included a new closing high Wednesday for the Dow Jones industrials. Investors had driven stocks broadly higher this week on optimism that Democrats taking control of Congress would cause political gridlock that would be favorable to businesses.
But after more time to mull over the election, investors are starting to become concerned about an "anti-business stance" among Democrats in Washington, said John O'Donoghue, co-head of equities at Cowen & Co.

Another thing that may change, the trade deficit narrowed by the most in the last 5 years.

It may be an interesting 2 years to come.

One Glint of Hope Amid the Gloom...

Congratulations, Congressman Peter Roskam!

I am proud to have helped, even in a small way.

And many thanks to Ross, Christina, Eric, Brett, Richard, Brian and everyone else for a job well done.

As for the big picture, on to 2008, when we take it all right back!

No retreat, no surrender!

God bless America.

Now More Than Ever

I wish this video could have been finished sooner before the elections, but please watch it. It starts off weird, but is a stark reminder of why politics are so important.


H/T: 100% Pure Premium Squeezed Conservative Propaganda

Top 5 Election Day Predictions!!

Showing the keen insight and incisive commentary that has made me famous throughout the blogosphere, here are my top 5 election predictions as the 2006 midterms get underway.

5. After exorcising Mike Dewine in Ohio, the voters will finally look at Sherrod Brown, collectively slap their foreheads like Alec Guinness at the end of The Bridge on the River Kwai and, ashen-faced, mutter Col. Nicholson's famous line, "My God, what have I done?"

4. Militant leftist gays across America will struggle to find a new word for this. (Note: not for the children, or anyone with a conscience or a sensitive stomach.)

3. Nancy Pelosi, on becoming Speaker of the House, will show up on the first day of the next Congress dressed as Lucy Van Pelt and be carrying a football labeled "impeachment."

2. More dead people than dogs will be found to have voted for Claire McCaskill in Missouri.

1. We'll never hear the word 'macaca' again.

(cross-posted at Joust The Facts)

The "Endorsement" to End All Endorsements!

This is freakin' hilarious!

Like many other bloggers out there, I have found myself on many e-mailing lists. Some of the mass mailings I receive, I actually do read when I have the time and the subject matter interests me. I don't often blog about it, however, as I am more-or-less a small to mid-level blogger without a huge following; I blog only part-time as the mood strikes me; and I don't really like to just parrot talking points from others when I do.

This particular message, however, from the quite persistent folks at the Diana Irey for Congress campaign, was just pure comedy gold! I really do hope she wins. God knows, I think Mr. Murtha is a Defeat-o-crat of the first order who has slandered our troops and cavorted with the worst elements of the fringe left lately (Code Pink for one example). Not that anyone in her corner of Pennsylvania is likely to read this little blog, but this is just way too funny not to share with everyone else.

I laughed out loud at the following "endorsement" for Rep. Murtha that the Irey campaign happily sent out far and wide. Not quite ready to believe it wasn't someone mistaking satire for an actual endorsement, I even went so far as to search for a link to the actual online version of the paper in question to confirm that this "endorsement" does, indeed, appear there just as portrayed... IT DOES!

If this is what pases for an "endorsement" nowadays... oh, just read these excerpts for yourselves:

From the November 3, 2006 Johnstown, PA Tribune-Democrat:

...While we endorse the local congressman in his re-election bid, we fear the spending spree that might result from a shift in power, especially as President Bush attempts to carve out a positive legacy in the final two years of his second term.

Our endorsement of Murtha over Republican challenger Diana Irey is done for some reasons that might surprise our readers, and comes with some words of caution for the longtime lawmaker....

Murtha did predict that Bush would be willing to do some dealing during his final two years, especially if the House shifts from Republican to Democratic control. Quite simply, that means spending more money at a time when our federal debt is soaring out of sight.

We urge the congressman, if re-elected, to push for reduced rather than increased spending – even if it means some of the “pork” local folks have come to love is not available.

After all, why should we get excited about Murtha bringing our own money back to this area? We’d rather keep it and spend it as we see fit.

We would also urge Murtha to sit down with area veterans who clearly have different views on the Iraq conflict than he does.

We are frightened by Murtha’s willingness to align himself with California Democrat Nancy Pelosi. Clearly, Murtha is hoping that relationship paves the way for his ascension to a position of higher power in the House. But we don’t believe our region’s values match well with Pelosi’s, and we don’t see much good coming for the 12th district – even if the relationship benefits the congressman.

Beyond that, Murtha has endeared himself to liberals on both coasts – raising money for his allies in California, New England and elsewhere. We hope he can keep these “friends” and their spending ways in check if the Democrats retake the House.

We are somewhat impressed with Irey, who presents herself as a thoughtful and articulate candidate.

She has some ideas that we’re interested in, including reducing federal spending.

We have opposed closing the borders to immigration, something she supports.

In the end, we endorse Murtha for another go-round in Washington.

But we urge him to remain faithful to his fiscally and socially conservative western Pennsylvania roots – even if it costs him in personal gain and national influence.

(Emphasis mine.)

What a ringing endorsement! Something akin to a woman staying with the ill-tempered, unemployed drunk who beats her hoping he'll change, rather than taking a chance on that nice clean-cut young man who is always so nice to her and trying to curry favor with her. After all, her old boyfriend just needs a little love and all will be made well with the world again... riiiiiiiiight!

Who says the media has lost touch with reality and jumped into bed with the Democrats? Nothing to see here, just move along...

A New Perspective On Immigration Laws

Open Borders supporters would like Americans to believe that we have laws governing immigration that are too strict, and need to be relaxed. I've found a list of truely strict laws that should make them flip their rocker.

• Foreigners are admitted “according to their possibilities of contributing to national progress.”
• Immigration officials must “ensure” that “immigrants will be useful elements for the country and that they have the necessary funds for their sustenance” and for their dependents.
• Federal, local and municipal police must cooperate with federal immigration authorities upon request, i.e., to assist in the arrests of illegal immigrants.
• A National Population Registry keeping track of “every single individual who comprises the population of the country,” and verifies each individual’s identity.
• Foreigners with fake immigration papers may be fined or imprisoned.
• Foreigners who sign government documents “with a signature that is false or different from that which he normally uses” are subject to fine and imprisonment.
• Foreigners who fail to obey a deportation order are to be punished.
• Foreigners who are deported from Mexico and attempt to re-enter the country without authorization can be imprisoned for up to 10 years.
• Foreigners who violate the terms of their visa may be sentenced to up to six years in prison. Foreigners who misrepresent the terms of their visa (such as working without a permit) can also be imprisoned.
• A penalty of up to two years in prison and a fine of thirty to five hundred dollars will be imposed on the foreigner who enters the country illegally.
• A citizen who marries a foreigner with the sole objective of helping the foreigner live in the country is subject to up to five years in prison.
• Foreigners will be restricted on which political offices they may hold.

Other possible laws that I haven't been able to authenticate yet:
If you migrate to this country, you must speak the native language.
You have to be a professional or an investor. No unskilled workers allowed.
There will be no special bilingual programs in the schools, no special ballots for elections, and all government business will be conducted in our language.
Foreigners will NOT have the right to vote no matter how long they are here.

Foreigners must not be a burden to the taxpayers.


Pretty harsh? Surely no country would impose such laws. You're wrong. Who has you might ask?

MEXICO

How ironic that the number one supplier of illegal immigrants to the United States is the country with one of the most strict immigration laws.

What Soldiers Are Saying

I get daily E-mails from CentCom in my mail box, and often times it is a recurring theme of "What Extremists Are Saying." It gives a blunt look at exactly what the media avoids when talking about Islamic Extremists:
The fact that they want to kill as many Americans as possible.

Well, Confederate Yankee, and Chester of The Adventures of Chester were given the oppertunity by Central Command to each interview two United States Military Police who are stationed in Iraq. Those interviewed were Staff Sargant Jason Oliver and Specialist Kimberly McGuiness.

Confederate Yankee's interview is here,
And Chester's Podcast of the interview is here.

Topics covered were:
Summarizing their duties.
The infamous 600,000 dead in Iraq study.
Is Iraq really the hell hole the media plays it out as?
Is progress being made?
Is the violence deteriorating?
What previous experience do the Iraqi Police have?
What could the Iraqi Police do to perform better?

And most importantly:
Will the Democrat solution of Cut and Run work? (Hint, signs point to NO!)

Just The Man For President!

According to Daniel Patrick Welch, Andrés Manuel López Obrador is the perfect candidate for the President of the United States of America.
Yeah, the same Obrado who could not accept his defeat to Felipe Calderon, even though the margin of 244,000 votes said he did.

After the election Obrador has called on his protestors to block the streets of Mexico City, costing local businesses $35 Million of dollars per day.

Since then, Obrador held a "fake convention" to announce himself "President elect," and has even gone so far as to begin picking cabinet members of his newly formed shadow government, and has promised to oppose any and all legislation that the REAL president brings forth.

Obrador's protestors have even gone so far to set off explosions in the Electorial Court after judges dismissed the claims of a fraudulant election.

Where do the Left get these ideas?

Missouri Senate race boils down to proper pronunciation of State's name.

Third in a series of mid-term election satire. Second is over at Conservathink.

"Missour-ah!"
"Missour-ee!"

The closest Senate race in the country just got even hotter. Following the Michael J. Fox flap, one would think that embryonic stem cell research and cloning would be the top issues on voters' minds. Polls show the two Senate candidates, incumbent Republican Senator Jim Talent and Democratic challenger State Auditor Claire McCaskill are neck-and-neck, but the odds may very well depend on whose pronunciation of the State's name most resonates with Missouri voters. At least 56% of those polled claim they say Missour-ah, and only 37% say Missour-ee. The rest punched the pollster in the face and yelled, "That's a f**king stupid question!"

"The people of Missour-ee are tired of being viewed as corn-fed hicks," Republican pollster Fred Kondracke asserted. "People think that we're just another fly-over State where we marry pigs or something. Well, let me tell you, Mrs. McCaskill's husbands are the exceptions to the rule!"

Democratic pollster Susan Powers disagrees: "We're just common folk like y'all down here in Missour-ah. We stand for real family values, unlike the GOP, like forced wage controls, socialistic health care and punishing the rich for their success. Real Missour-ah val-yoos."

Missouri is often called a "bellwether State" due to its use of bells to tell which way the wind is blowing... The political winds, that is!

...

Oh, screw you all.

Regardless, the State may very well determine who controls the Senate come Tuesday, as well as whether pointless semantics can sway the results of a State-wide election.