Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Captions Outrageous! Winners [Some Assembly Required Edition]

Announcing the winners of the 6th Right Place Photo Caption Contest of Season Two!

This has to be one of our best contests ever! Thank you to one and all who participated!

Presenting the TOP 60 captions for this picture from AP Photo/CBS Face the Nation, Karin Cooper via Yahoo!


-- "The fact that the new model is more realistic than the original is not what I'd call good news."

-- "Okay, next time we spend the money for better quality plastic."

Alan Kellogg

-- ♫ Hello!... (Hello!... Hello!...)
Is there anybody in there? ♫


-- "This is your brain on moonbattery... any questions?"


-- "I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. DeStephanopoulos."

-- "Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter... and then we get spring and summer again."

charles austin

-- The Lamont-model Kos-bot shorts out at a crucial moment of the campaign.

D. Carter

-- WOMAN: "Oh, no! He's leaking bulls**t again..."
MAN ON RIGHT: "We need to keep that superfluous third nipple hidden, too."

Damian G.

-- "Remember: Don't insert tab A into slot B, or he might say something rational and confuse everyone." (Warning from the Assembly and Maintenance chapter of DailyKos' Lamont Instruction Manual.)

-- "Somebody call Dr. Noonian Sung! We found the other one!"


-- "Stepford? My favorite place. Why do you ask?"

Greg Finnegan

-- "Dammit! I know I put the artifical intelligence unit in here somewhere..."

IRA Darth Aggie

-- All your moonbats are belong to us!

-- HANDLER: "Okay, Ned, now when someone asks, 'Why?', you can't keep saying, 'KOS I said so'."

-- Following a natural progression, the Democrats move on from just using dead voters to actually using dead politicians.

-- ♫ Raise taxes a-lot-o, Mr. Roboto! ♫


-- Ned Lamont enters the Clutch Cargo look-a-like contest.

John Ruberry

-- Although Election Day is eleven weeks away, Ned Lamont already looks like he's DOA.


-- "Okay, wheel in Castro!"

the man

-- He's come a long way from frying up Krabby Patties in Bikini Bottom.

-- And people thought Dan Quayle had that "deer in the headlights" look.


-- Ned Lamont is immortalized for future generations by the same team of scientists who brought you Lenin and Evita Peron.


-- "Animated? This guy makes Al Gore look like Sonic the Hedgehog."

-- "Okay, I got the cattle prod, let's start this sucker up."

Rodney Dill

-- "Betty... this man has no heartbeat!"

-- Disney's "Imagineers" put the finishing touches on an animatronic figure in it's latest ride "The Hall of Senators" located in the Fantasyland section of their theme park in Orlando.

-- "Get down here! You gotta see this! I'm telling you, this guy's got a prehensile tail!"

Special Ed

-- Technicians touch up a new wax figure at Madam Tussaud's.

-- Technicians touch up Joe Lieberman's new lawn jockey.


-- "We should have upgraded from Personality 0.13a."


-- "Hey, if you guys had to spend as much time as I do listening to your Kostard supporters spout conspiracy theories, you'd learn to keep a straight face, too."

-- "So, how did you like those brownies, Mr. Lamont... Mr. Lamont?"

-- "Next on Face the Nation, Ned Lamont will answer charges that he's a mindless left-wing robot."

-- "He looked at Helen Thomas and turned to stone. Dibs on his wallet!"

V the K

-- The installation of the "Moderate Module" hit a few snags.

-- Never mind Snakes on a Plane, the new, scarier movie is Flake Without a Brain!

-- Technicians worked feverishly to save Ned Lamont after his first encounter with Helen Thomas.

-- "Sh*t, this ain't gonna work. The 'deer in headlights' look is stuck."

-- "Okay, people, we are almost ready. Now, where did we put his brain?"


-- An heir to the fortune of one of the founders of J.P. Morgan, Ned Lamont was visibly uncomfortable having only two people waiting on him hand and foot.

W.C. Varones


#20: "Markos Moulitsas has raised the art of political sockpuppetry to unprecedented levels. Ned is more lifelike than the digital Yoda!" -- Gene Shalit


#19: "Boy, that's the last time we go with that mortician! This guy looks terrible!"


#18: "Wellstone won by debating a cardboard cutout. We can win by BEING a cardboard cutout."


#17: "We never should have loaned him to John Edwards for the weekend. Now his positronic network is clogged with hair spray!"

V the K

#16: The crash test dummy is prepared for his high-speed collision with the electorate in November.

D. Carter

#15: GUY WITH HEADSET: "Okay... who unplugged Lamont?"


#14: "Okay, bring in Primping Consultant, John Edwards."

Rodney Dill

#13: It only got really scary when they flipped open his head to reveal a hamster running furiously in a wheel.


#12: "Whose turn is it to stick their hand up the dummy's butt?"


#11: Trying to court the NASCAR vote, Lamont adopts a pit crew.


#10: Batteries not included.

Rodney Dill

#9: Weekend at Neddie's

hatless in hattiesburg

#8: [*muffled voice*] "Oilcan! Oilcan!"


#7: WOMAN IN BLAZER: "Closing headflap... Check."
MAN IN BLUE SHIRT: "Inserting battery... Check."
MAN WITH HEADSET: "Downloading talking points from DU in five, four, three..."


#6: "Let me just cover up those three sixes on your forehead, Mr. Lamont."

V the K

#5: "Ned Lamont, liberal. A man barely alive. Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic candidate. Ned Lamont will be that man. Lefter than he was before. Lefter, stronger, faster..."

the man

#4: "Mr. Schieffer, you really need to stop hypnotizing the guests."


#3: "This doomed candidacy has been made possible by the Chubb Group and by Leftists like you."

Damian G.

#2: ♫ His hair was perfect. Yeeeaaarrrggghhh! Moonbats of New London. Yeeeaaarrrggghhh! ♫

charles austin

And the winning entry for this Caption Contest...

#1: ...And all the Kos horses, and all the Kos men... couldn't give Lamont electability again.



♫ Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Ned
Rich profiteer, and it all went to his head
After reading Daily KOS, only thing he could conclude
He'd steal a Senate seat from that Lieberman dude.

Now, most folks know old Ned's a millionaire
He's got a staff of twenty and they all tend to his hair
They say Washington is the place you ought to be
You don't need a platform, just spout out hyperbole ♫


Bravo! Bravo!

Encore! Encore!

Captions Outrageous! [Mad Hatter Edition]



#1 - Dissenting Opinion Edition
#2 - White Raspbeary Edition
#3 - Totally Busted Edition
#4 - Havana Good Time, Glad You're Not Here Edition
#5 - Right Hand to God Edition


The Beards and the Beads Edition

Right Place Photo Caption Contest Hall of Glory


Thanks for the link!

The Conservative Cat

No comments: