Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Here's an Idea...

On my way home today, I noticed that a few of the houses I passed were flying their flags again - not many, but a few. As soon as I got home, I put mine out as well.

Maybe it's nothing, but it just felt right - a small gesture of solidarity for our fellow Americans who have been so terribly impacted by this horrific hurricane and its brutal aftermath.

So what do you say, folks? Will you please join me in flying your flags?

3D Animated Flags by

Katrina's Aftermath

Hurricane Katrina will be no more in a couple of hours, yet the damage the storm caused will linger for many months to come. Our hearts go out to the victims whose lives were claimed, as well as the survivors who must start the painful process of rebuilding their lives.

For those of us who can, a contribution to a relief agency such as The Red Cross or Catholic Charities would be welcome.

-Stephen Johnson-


Thank you, Stephen.

I would just like to take this opportunity to add a few words here. I have spent the last couple of days trying to get my head around this immense tragedy, but I still find myself unable to truly comprehend it, as it just all seems so unreal. My heart and my prayers go out to all of the people affected by this horrific storm and its aftermath.

If you would like to help, in addition to Stephen's fine suggestions, you can find more here:

Instapundit - Flood Aid Update.

I have also heard a number of people on both radio and television saying good things about this charity over the last two days:

Feed the Children.

And there is always another old favorite:

The Salvation Army.

Any more suggestions or links are welcome in the comments section.

-Mr. Right-

Monday, August 29, 2005

The U.S. Constitution - A Liberal Interpretation

For years, many rational people, conservative pundits and Constitutional scholars among them, have been at a complete loss to explain the behavior of many on the left side of the political spectrum in this country, particularly in relation to our court system. Now, for the first time, we may have an explanation!

In another Right Place exclusive, we have obtained a copy of the U.S. Constitution, complete with crib notes, from the desk of a Judge on the very liberal U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals, who shall remain unnamed. This document, being made public here for the first time, may go a long way towards explaining the behavior of many left wing jurists and politicians in this country, if they are all working from similar copies of the Constitution.

So, in honor of the new Iraqi Constitution, the Right Place proudly presents:

The U.S. Constitution - through the eyes of a liberal...


We the People of the United States progressive-minded citizens of the North American Province of the United Nations, in Order to form a more perfect Union obtain a far groovier chakra, establish Social Justice, get righteous with Mother Earth, insure domestic Tranquility partnerships of any nature, provide for the common defence promotion of peace, free love and a total lack of responsibility, promote the general creation of the Welfare State, and secure the Blessings of Liberty some boss doobage to for ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America North American Province of the United Nations.

Article I

Section 1

All legislative Powers herein granted shall be vested in a Congress of the United States, which shall consist of a Senate and House of Representatives and shall be subjugated to the will of the United Nations.

Section 2

Clause 1: The House of Representatives shall be composed of Members chosen every second Year by the People of the several blue States....

Clause 2: No Person shall be a Representative who shall not have attained to the Age of twenty five Years, and been seven Years a Citizen of the United States, and who shall not, when elected, be an Inhabitant of that State in which he shall be chosen approval of the Democrat Party.

Clause 3: Representatives and direct Taxes shall be apportioned among the several States which may be included within this Union, according to their respective Numbers collected in mass quantities from the rich, which shall be determined to be anyone who makes more than $10,000.00 per year...

Clause 4: When vacancies happen in the Representation from any State, the Executive Authority thereof shall issue Writs of Election to media shall fill such Vacancies.

Clause 5: The House of Representatives DNC shall choose their Speaker and other Officers; and shall have the sole Power of Impeachment over the evil Chimpy McBushitler.

Section 3

Clause 1: The Senate of the United States shall be composed of two Senators from each blue State, chosen by the Legislature media thereof, for six Years life; and each Democrat Senator shall have one Vote as many Votes as they need to overcome the evil Nazis of the Republican Party.

Clause 2: Blah, Blah, Blah...

Clause 3: Yadda, Yadda, Yadda...

Clause 4: The Vice President of the United States shall be President of the Senate, but shall have no Vote, unless they be equally divided a Democrat.

Clause 5: The Senate shall choose their other Officers, and also a President pro tempore, in the Absence of the Vice President, or when he shall exercise the Office of President of the United States.

Clause 6: The Senate shall have the sole Power to try all Impeachments of that traitorous piece of subhuman filth, "the Shrub". When sitting for that Purpose, they shall be on Oath or Affirmation television. When the President of the United States Bushitler is tried, the Chief Justice Rep. John Conyers shall preside: And no Person he shall be convicted without the Concurrence of two thirds of the Members present.

Clause 7: Judgment in Cases of Impeachment shall not extend further than to removal from Office, and disqualification to hold and enjoy any Office of honor, Trust or Profit under the United States: but the Party convicted shall nevertheless be liable and subject to Indictment, Trial, Judgment and Punishment, according to Law result in immediate summary execution, though we don't believe in capital punishment except for evil Republicans.

Section 4

Clause 1: The Times, Places and Manner of holding Elections for Senators and Representatives, shall be prescribed in each State by the Legislature thereof; but the Congress may at any time by Law make or alter such Regulations, except as to the Places of chusing Senators as whenever most convenient for the Democrat Party's base.

Clause 2: Whatever...

Section 5

Clause 1: Each House shall be the Judge of the Elections, Returns and Qualifications of its own Members, and a Majority of each shall constitute a Quorum to do Business; but a smaller Number may adjourn from day to day, and may be authorized to compel the Attendance of absent Members, in such Manner, and under such Penalties as each House may provide run by the Democrats in perpetuity.

Clause 2: Each House Progressive bloggers may determine the Rules of its Proceedings, punish its Members for disorderly Behaviour Republicans, and, with the Concurrence of two thirds George Soros, expel a Member Tom DeLay.

Clause 3: Each House shall keep a Journal of its Proceedings, and from time to time publish the same, excepting such Parts as may in their Judgment require Secrecy embarrass a Democrat; and the Yeas and Nays of the Members of either House on any question shall, at the Desire of one fifth of those Present Democrats, be entered on the Journal.

Clause 4: Ho Hum...

Section 6


Section 7

Clause 1: All Bills for raising Revenue shall originate in the House of Representatives; but the Senate may propose or concur with Amendments as on other Bills pass by overwhelming margins.

Clause 2: Every Bill which shall have passed the House of Representatives and the Senate, shall, before it become a Law, be presented to the new President of the United States, a Democrat; If he approve he shall sign it... who are we kidding, if it includes a nice fat, juicy tax increase, he'll sign it!

Clause 3: Moving Right Along...

Section 8

Clause 1: The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect copious punitive Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare recipients of the United States...

Clause 2: To borrow steal Money on the credit of the United States;

Clause 3: To regulate Commerce with kiss the asses of foreign Nations, and among the several States, and with the Indian Tribes;

Clause 4: To establish an uniform Rule of Naturalization open the borders, and uniform Laws on the subject of Bankruptcies throughout the United States;

Clause 5: To coin print Money, regulate the Value thereof, and of foreign Coin, and fix the Standard of Weights and Measures outcome of all future elections in favor of Democrats;

Clause 6: To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin of the United States;

Clause 7: To establish Post Offices and post Roads and to post the phone numbers of hot interns on the walls of the men's restroom;

Clause 8: To promote the Progressives of Science and useful tasteless Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries tax money for pictures of religious icons in jars of urine;

Clause 9: To recognize that this constitution Tribunals is wholly inferior to the supreme Court;

Clause 10: To define and punish Piracies and Felonies committed on the high Seas, and Offences against the Law of Nations Republicans and Conservatives;

Clause 11: To declare War, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning Captures on Land and Water Peace, because if we just wish really, really hard and promise to get along with everybody, they will all love us and we can hold hands and hug and make love not war;

Clause 12: To raise and support Armies, but no Appropriation of Money to that Use shall be for a longer Term than two Years more taxes for social programs;

Clause 13: To provide and maintain a Navy nice buzz;

Clause 14: To make Rules for the Government and Regulation immediate dismantling of the land and naval Forces;

Clause 15: To provide for calling forth the Militia to execute the Laws of the Union, suppress Insurrections and repel Invasions No! No! No!;

Clause 16: To provide for organizing, arming, and disciplining, the Militia, and for governing such Part of them as may be employed in the Service of the United States, reserving to the States respectively, the Appointment of the Officers, and the Authority of training the Militia according to the discipline prescribed by Congress Can't we all just get along?;

Clause 17: To exercise exclusive Legislation in all Cases whatsoever, over such District (not exceeding ten Miles square) as may, byCession of particular States, and the Acceptance of Congress, become the Seat of the Government of the United States, and to exercise like Authority over all Places purchased by the Consent of the Legislature of the State in which the Same shall be, for the Erection of Forts, Magazines, Arsenals, dock-Yards, and other needful Buildings All we are saying, is Give Peace a Chance...;--And

Clause 18: To make all Laws which shall be necessary and proper... Blah, Blah, Blah...

Section 8? Wait, isn't there supposed to be something about subsidized housing? Oh, and Klinger wearing dresses? Oops! My bad! Wrong Section 8's. Nevermind.

Section 9

Clause 1: The Migration or Importation of such all Persons as any of the States now existing shall think proper to admit who manage to sneak across the borders, shall not be prohibited by the Congress prior to the Year one thousand eight hundred and eight, but a Tax or duty may be imposed on such Importation, not exceeding ten dollars for each Person as long as they can be registered to vote as Democrats.

Clause 2: The Privilege of the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall not be suspended, unless when in Cases of Rebellion or Invasion the public Safety an opportunity to nail that fat bastard, Rush Limbaugh may require it.

Clause 3: No Bill of Attainder or ex post facto Law shall be passed We'll do whatever we want to, so there!.

Clause 4: No Capitation, or other direct, Tax shall be laid, unless in Proportion to the Census or Enumeration herein before directed to be taken. Smoked by Amendment XVI, In Your Face, Founders!

Clause 5: No Tax or Duty shall be laid on Articles exported from any State You didn't see anything here, keep moving!.

Clause 6: Boring!

Clause 7: No Money shall be drawn from the Treasury, but in Consequence of Appropriations made by Law; and a regular Statement and Account of the Receipts and Expenditures of all public Money shall be published from time to time used to further the cause of Socialism Oops! Er... Uh... Progressivism.

Clause 8: No Title of Nobility shall be granted by the United States: And no Person holding any Office of Profit or Trust under them, shall, without the Consent of the Congress, accept of any present, Emolument, Office, or Title, of any kind whatever, from any King, Prince, or foreign State except to members of the Kennedy Family.

Section 10

Who cares? Next!

Article II

Section 1

Clause 1: The executive Power shall be vested in a Democrat President of the United States of America. He or SHE (you Medieval sexist pigs) shall hold his or HER Office during the Term of four Years, and, together with the Vice President, chosen for the same Term, be elected, as follows

Clause 2: Poof! It's gone!

Clause 3: Nope! No more Electors, the Founders were idiots and that's how we got stuck with Chimpy in the first place, so bugger off!

Clause 4: The Congress Labor Unions may determine the Time of choosing the Electors President, and the Day on which they shall give their Votes; which Day shall be the same throughout the United States.

Clause 5: No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States. This means you, Terminator! Exceptions may be made for special people like Jennifer Granholm, however, or, be still my beating heart, Jacques Chirac!

Clause 6: In Case of the Removal of the President Shrub from Office, or of his Death, Resignation, or Inability to discharge the Powers and Duties of the said Office, Oh happy day! the Same shall devolve on the VicePresident, and the Congress may by Law provide for the Case of Removal, Death, Resignation or Inability, both of the President and Vice President, declaring what Officer shall then act as President, and such Officer shall act accordingly, until the Disability be removed, or a President John Kerry shall be elected, or maybe President Al Gore. Since Chimpy stole elections from both of them, they can arm wrestle for it, best 2 out of 3 wins.

Clause 7: The President shall, at stated Times, receive for his Services, a Compensation, which shall neither be encreased nor diminished during the Period for which he shall have been elected, and he shall not receive within that Period any other Emolument from the United States, or any of them include the occasional hummer from an intern of his choosing.

Clause 8: Before he enter on the Execution of his Office, he shall take the following Oath or Affirmation:--"I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States spotted owl."

Section 2

Clause 1: The President shall be Commander in Chief of the Salvation Army and Old Navy department stores of the United States, and of the Militia of the several States, when called into the actual Service of the United States; he may require the Opinion permission, in writing, of the principal Officer in each of the executive Departments, upon any Subject relating to the Duties of their respective Offices France, and he shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment to Marc Rich and selected members of the FALN.

Clause 2: He shall have Power, by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, to make Treaties, provided two thirds of the Democrat Senators present concur; and he shall nominate, and by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, shall appoint Ambassadors, other public Ministers and Consuls but not John Bolton, progressive-minded Judges of the supreme Court unanimously approved by Jesse Jackson, Ted Kennedy, and NARAL and all other Officers of the United States, whose Appointments are not herein otherwise provided for, and which shall be established by Law: but the Congress may by Law vest the Appointment of such inferior Officers, as they think proper, in the President alone, in the Courts of Law, or in the Heads of Departments shall be appointed by the members of PETA and the Sierra Club.

Clause 3: The President shall have Power to fill up all Vacancies that may happen during the Recess of the Senate, by granting Commissions which shall expire at the End of their next Session That's Cheating! (Well, unless Clinton does it.).

Section 3

He shall from time to time give to the Congress Information of the State of the Union... Blah, Blah, Blah...

Section 4

The President, Vice President and all civil Officers of the United States, shall be removed from Office on Impeachment for, and Conviction of, Treason, Bribery, or other high Crimes and Misdemeanors or for being a Republican - same thing! Oh, and lying about sex under oath doesn't count, so there.

Article III

Section 1

The judicial Power of the United States, shall be vested in one supreme Court, and in such inferior Courts as the Congress may from time to time ordain and establish. The Judges, both of the supreme and inferior Courts, shall hold their Offices during good Behaviour, and shall, at stated Times, receive for their Services, a Compensation, which shall not be diminished during their Continuance in Office be unabashed liberal activists and devout atheists, and will swear allegiance to Planned Parenthood and the ACLU.

Section 2

Clause 1: The judicial Power shall extend to all facets of life.

Clause 2: Yawn...

Clause 3: The Trial of all Crimes, except in Cases of Impeachment, shall be by Jury... Yeah, Yeah, Yeah... Oh, and O.J. was framed, you racists!

Section 3

Clause 1: Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying of supporting the War against Iraq them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. No Person shall be convicted of Treason unless on the Testimony of two Witnesses to the same overt Act, or on Confession in open Court or "outing" Super-Secret Agent Valerie Plame to Bob Novak.

Clause 2: The Congress Michael Moore shall have Power to declare the Punishment of Treason, but no Attainder of Treason shall work Corruption of Blood, or Forfeiture except during the Life of the Person attainted and sit on your head.

Article IV

Full Faith and Credit shall be given in each State to the public Acts, Records, and judicial Proceedings of every other State... Suffice it to say that according to liberal activist judges, anything goes because of this here Article, Spunky! 'Nuff said!

Article V

The Congress, whenever two thirds of both Houses shall deem it necessary, shall propose Amendments to this Constitution... Yakety, Schmakety

Article VII
The Ratification... Been there, done that

Constitutional Amendments:

The Bill of Rights:

Amendment I

Congress The Courts shall make allow no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech but only if it agrees with the progressive point of view, otherwise it is hate speech, or of the press except for the lying Nazi swine at Fox News, right wing talk show hosts, right wing bloggers or anyone else who tries to counter our point of view in public; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, wave badly misspelled signs and sing We Shall Overcome, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances and legalized mind-altering drugs. Oh, and there's a right to privacy, too - cause we said so. And everyone has an inherent right never to be offended by something somebody else says or does, except Christians and Conservatives, who have no Rights whatsoever. And legalized abortion, too!

Amendment II

Move along, nothing to see here! It doesn't mean what it says anyway, you troglodyte!

Amendment III

No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law speak out against that great War Hero, Sen. John Kerry.

Amendment IV

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized. Let the good times roll! Oh! And more privacy... and legalized abortion, too!

Amendment V

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation unless the local government can make a nice profit off of it. Hey! Get away from Judge Souter's house, that's not what we meant, damnit!

Amendment VI

In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the Assistance of Counsel for his defence and a gentle slap on the wrist from an understanding judge who really cares.

Amendment VII

In Suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise re-examined in any Court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law the Jury shall find in favor of the plaintiff against the evil corporations who like to kill and maim people and do no good for anybody ever anyway, so what do we care.

Amendment VIII

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted, especially on those nice boys from al Qaeda being held at Guantanamo Bay.

Amendment IX

The enumeration in the Constitution , of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people courts. Pssssttt! We're pretty sure they meant that it's okay to have an abortion!

Amendment X

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people great sages in their black robes. And we grant you your abortions!

More Constitutional Amendments:

Amendment XI

The Judicial power of the United States shall not be construed to extend to any suit in law or equity, commenced or prosecuted against one of the United States by Citizens of another State, or by Citizens or Subjects of any Foreign State. Except, of course, for foreign nationals captured out of uniform on foreign soil attempting to kill our soldiers, who are entitled to the full protections of our courts from those barbarians in the military, those poor boys.

Amendment XII


Amendment XIII

Section 1. Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.

Section 2. Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.

Read it and weep, Rednecks! You know you want to repeal it - c'mon admit it! We know all Republicans hate this, even if it was put in there by, well, a bunch of Republicans, but that was just for show! You're all still racists and you know it! Oh! And that no more slavery thing goes for my womb, too! Hands off, turkey!

Amendment XIV

That's right! The motherlode! Civil Rights, baby! You don't have to read it, it says whatever we want it to say anyway... And you better believe legalized abortion, too, I tell you what! Oh, and stem cells! It's in there! Trust us!

Amendment XV

Section 1. The right of citizens of the United States to vote for Democrats shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of race, color, or previous condition of servitude or immigration status, or failure to register, or voting multiple times or in multiple precincts or on account of being dead, or a convicted felon or imaginary, or a housepet, or an aborted fetus, etc. But those absentee ballots from Armed Services personnel, chuck 'em in the trash can, chum - we don't want 'em counted! By the way... In case of a close election, just keep counting until the Democrat wins!

Section 2. The Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation. So there!

Amendment XVI

The Congress shall have power to lay and collect taxes on incomes, from whatever source derived, without apportionment among the several States, and without regard to any census or enumeration.

Woo-hoo! Party!!! Celebrate good times, c'mon! And we can fund our abortions, too!

Amendment XVII

Direct election of Senators. Yawn...

Amendment XVIII

Prohibition - It's now gone the way of the dodo. Next!

Amendment XIX

The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex.

Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.

I am woman, hear me roar... Take that, you sexist pig Republicans, you! Everything bad is all your fault, and don't you ever forget it! Abortions for everybody!

Amendment XX

Mostly Presidential term and succession mumbo jumbo. It says that when we impeach Bush, whomever we want gets to become President, so there!

Amendment XXI

Bye-bye Prohibition, hello booze! (Teddy's favorite!)

Amendment XXII

Section 1. No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice... except Bill Clinton! Oh, and Hillary, too!

Amendment XXIII

D.C. Representation. Three free Electoral Votes for Democrats! Yes! (Oh, wait, we just decided to get rid of those things, didn't we?)

Amendment XXIV

No more poll tax, Mr. Jim Crow. And by that I mean you, you Republican racists! And don't start telling me the Democrats ran all those Southern States back then, because we all know who the real racists are, now don't we?

Amendment XV

More Presidential succession stuff. Oh, and we can now replace the Vice President, whoop-de-doo!

Amendment XXVI

18 Year Old skulls full of mush can now vote! Woo-hoo! More free votes for us from the young and naive! MTV Rock the Vote, baby! Yeah! Pssssttt... Bush is going to reinstate the draft! No really, he is! Any day now...

Amendment XXVII

No law varying the compensation for the services of the Senators and Representatives shall take effect until an election of Representatives shall have intervened. We'll just stop with 26 - a nice even number, what do you say? I didn't see this one if you didn't!

NOTE: Post corrected for grammatical error.


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The 9/11 Commission, Part 2 - Electric Boogaloo
Democrats Give up on Winning, Push for More "Spectacular" Losses
We Now Join the "Save Air America Radio" Telethon, Already in Progress...
Top Secret Democrat Party Strategy Meeting - Exposed!
The Far-Left's Favorite Soap Opera: Get Bush!
You Just Might Be a Moonbat...
Selections from the "Donktionary"
The Moonbat Song

The Hill-Orgy of Errors:
Hillary Clinton's Secret Love Affair Exposed!
Bigfoot Takes His Own Life!
The Right Place Stands By Its Story!

And a Filthy Lie:
Glenn Reynolds Copyrights the Word "Indeed," Threatens to Bill Much of Blogosphere Right out of Existence!

Or feel free to check out our Main Page.

Thank you for visiting The Right Place!


Thanks for the links!

H-Bomb at Ankle Biting Pundits
Pat Curley at Brainster's Blog
Basil at Basil's Blog has invited us all to Supper.
Carl at No Oil for Pacifists
Bruce the Human Pet at The Conservative Cat
Jeff Nolan at Venture Chronicles
Mick Wright at Fishkite
lulu's mama at DurbWorld
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Carnival of the Clueless #12 at Right Wing Nut House
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Carnival of Crazy V at File It Under...

Be certain to check out more of the fine posts linked by these great events!

Sheehan Meets With The President

Well, not the *real* president:

Cindy Sheehan still hasn't achieved a meeting with the president during her three-week-long war protest near his ranch, but she met a man who plays one on TV.

Martin Sheen, who plays Democratic President Josiah "Jeb" Bartlet on NBC's "The West Wing," went to Sheehan's makeshift campsite Sunday. He is known for his peace activism.

"At least you've got the acting president of the United States," Sheen said as the crowd of more than 300 people cheered. "I think you know what I do for a living, but this is what I do to stay alive."

The streak of no major Democratic politician making a pilgrimage to Camp Cindy continues unbroken, "President" Bartlet notwithstanding.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Now You Know Why They Call Him "Brainster"

A round of applause for our buddy Pat Curley at Brainster's Blog and Lifelike Pundits!

First of all, his brilliant fisking of a ludicrous column from the New York Times' resident Moonbat, Paul Krugman, appears to have actually played a role in forcing Mr. Krugman to first, waste a column trying to defend his silly assertions, and then, later on, have to (more or less) partially correct himself! Bravo, Pat!

Meanwhile, are you tired of arguing with liberals about whether or not President Bush lied about yellowcake from Niger? Pat puts the issue to rest once and for all! A must read!

On top of that, Pat was nominated by Watcher of Weasels for non-council post of the week for this hilarious send up of the Fantastic Four!

Wow! What a week, Pat! Congratulations!

New Contest Promises iPod Shuffle as First Prize!

This is a fun idea! Blogger "Bohemian Like You" of Where Have You Gone, Ronald Reagan?, a very amusing blog and a recent addition to our blogroll, has launched a new contest and is promising an iPod Shuffle as first prize! Better yet, he credits yours truly for the inspiration! Why not head on over and try your hand at the new "Outrage a Liberal" Headline submission contest? You just might be glad that you did!



Mandatory evacuations have been ordered for the entire city of New Orleans and much of the surrounding area as Hurricane Katrina, a devastatingly powerful category 5 storm that is still strengthening, is taking dead aim at the "Big Easy."

Experts warn New Orleans could be submerged by as much as 20 feet of water in the wake of this storm. Electric grid anticipated to be "destroyed," could take "weeks or months" to repair.

We encourage all people who may be in the forecasted track of this storm to tune to local news sources for instructions and to be prepared to evacuate or seek shelter immediately.


NOAA's NWS Storm Prediction Center
NOAA's NWS National Hurricane Center
The Weather Channel
Louisiana State Police - State Emergencies
Fox News
Associated Press

Want Fries With That?

The Nanny State is alive and well in California:

Potato chips and french fries could soon come with a warning label in California if the state's top attorney prevails in a lawsuit filed Friday against nine fast food chains and snack-food makers.

Attorney General Bill Lockyer asked for a court order requiring McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, Frito Lay and other companies to warn consumers that their fries and chips may contain acrylamide, a chemical the state says causes cancer.

Acrylamide, as it turns out, is not an additive to these foods, but the natural by-product of heating starches in hot oil. And the evidence linking it to cancer, though found in some studies is not a slam dunk. Yet, it's full steam ahead for the Health Food Police.

Everyone knows that eating fried foods is not healthy - yet they eat them anyway. On the other hand, attempts by fast-food chains to introduce healthier fare to their menus have had mixed results, at best. Make no mistake, the issue here is *not* the health of the consumer. The proposed labelling of fries as a carcinogen is the start of the trial-lawyer assault on the fast-food industry.

"Lance Boiled"

I'm not a big bike racing fan, but the achievements of Lance Armstrong in the Tour de France in recent years has taken the sport out of its niche audience. Winning the race an unprecedented seven times, Armstrong has become a household name while dominating a sport like no one else has in recent memory. That an American displayed such prowess on French soil is icing on the cake.

Geoffrey Wheatcroft has an interesting article today in Opinion Journal about the Tour de France, which ties up the French resentment of Lance Armstrong and the history of doping by contestants in the race in one neat package. Wheatcroft saves the best for last:

There may or may not be dirty tricks going on, but the French have never really come to terms with their eclipse in their own great race. More generally, France is going through a grave crisis of confidence, which takes political and economic expression--and sporting as well, with the French showing no sign of regaining their eminence in the Tour. Maybe life would be easier for them, and for all of us, if les bleus could win the soccer World Cup again next year.

Soccer is another sport that I don't follow, but I'll have a rooting interest against the French in the World Cup.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Caption This! [Weapons of Mash Destruction Edition]

The above photo comes to us from REUTERS/Denis Balibouse via Yahoo!

This contest will last approximately one week.

Good luck!


Oh, Thank Heaven for 7/11 Edition
Fickle Finger of Fate Edition
Things Are Looking Up Edition
Rage in the Cage Edition
Not So Mellow Fellow in Yellow Edition
The Beards and the Beads Edition


Thanks for the links!

Rodney Dill at OTB with OTB Caption Jam
Oregano at Cafe Oregano with Carnival of the Caption Contests
Chris at Lucky Dawg News



This contest is now closed...


New contest is HERE!

Thank you all for playing!

Caption This! Winners [The Beards and the Beads Edition]

Announcing the winners of the sixth ever Right Place Photo Caption Contest!

Thank you to one and all who participated!

Presenting the top ten captions for this picture [AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite via Yahoo!]...

Special Mention - Rodney Dill, with last week's OTB Caption Jam link:

The Right Place has found the missing ZZ Top Band members.

And the winners...

#10: We're here for the Soros Family Reunion.

Bill W.

#9: Where's Cindy? We want to Make LOVE not war.


#8: The Wrinkles and PU Brigade of A.N.S.W.E.R. arrive at Crawford.


#7: Dude on right: "I've cried so much my glaucoma is acting up."


#6: The razor and soap shortage hit Carl the hardest. However, he refused to lose his faith in America for it.


#5: No! Look! They're not extinct!! The last three Democrats in America!


#4: Guy in blue explaining why they're there to support Cindy: "I'm blind, Johnny here ain't too smart, an' poor ol' Frank back there... well he got a flag pole stuck up his butt... and it's all George Bush's fault!"


#3: Earl (left) washes his hands after loading the rectal flag launcher while Jeb (right) sites the target and James (center) prepares to launch his 'tribute to the troops.'

Special Ed

#2: Disconsolate after learning the "Jerry Garcia Comeback Tour" was just a hoax, Chakra, Coyote and Thyme head back to their parents' basements.

Buckley F. Williams

And the winning entry for this Caption Contest...

#1: The three "wisemen" arrive at Crawford to visit "Mother" Sheehan.


Bravo! Bravo!

Encore! Encore!


Caption This! [Weapons of Mash Destruction Edition]



Oh, Thank Heaven for 7/11 Edition
Fickle Finger of Fate Edition
Things Are Looking Up Edition
Rage in the Cage Edition
Not So Mellow Fellow in Yellow Edition

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Unintended Consequences?

Mickey Kaus:

Recent multiple exposures to Westside L.A. liberals confirms that (as George Will and Kevin Drum suggest) Hillary Clinton is currently heading for a much bigger train wreck in her party than anticipated--a wreck all her cautious planning failed to anticipate, and probably exacerbated.

The same press drumbeat of defeatism about Iraq that has helped bring down Bush’s numbers has also emboldened the party’s mainstream left base (i.e., not just MoveOn or the DailyKos crowd). They hardly care whether Hillary is a member of the DLC. But they do not want to support someone who voted for the war, as Hillary did. Worse, they want a Democrat who is willing to break from the respectable Beltway Tough-It-Out Consensus now, publicly, in a way Hillary has been unable to do. They’re so desperate for a champion they’re even temporarily captivated by Sen. Hagel’s mere mention of “Vietnam.” Hagel/Dean for America! Or maybe Hagel/Gingrich. …

All of this dovetails with an earlier post of mine, quoting conservative pundits. With the liberal Kaus on board, the Democrat Trainwreck Theory now has bipartisan support.

UPDATE. James Taranto offers this analysis of the Kaus article:

Specifically, what are we to make of polls showing 55% or so of Americans think the war a "mistake"? It seems very likely that this group can be broken down into two distinct subgroups: those who opposed the war from the start (about 30% of the total, to judge by polls back then), and those who initially supported it but now have misgivings.

Now, there may be a few people who backed the war but have come around to the Michael worldview. But our guess is that most of those who've had second thoughts about the war have been influenced by that "press drumbeat of defeatism" Kaus cites. Their views could change if the tone of the news coverage changes, or if they are persuaded that the tone doesn't reflect reality. The point is that if they now think, or fear, that the war was a mistake, it is because they are afraid we may lose.

The other group--the antiwar core--consists of people whose priority is ending, not winning, the war, and some of whom actually want America to lose. This is the group that, as Kaus notes, is increasingly getting the attention of the media and asserting itself within the Democratic Party. That will make it difficult for the Democrats to offer a credible alternative to nervous voters who want to win.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

The MuNuvians Are Back Online!

After a server meltdown wiped out some of the blogosphere's finest for much of yesterday and part of today, they're back!

So pop on over and get caught up with...

Ace of Spades
The Jawa Report
Llama Butchers

and the rest of your MuNu favs!

Tell 'em Mr. Right sent ya!

That is all.

A Request for Prayers

Lorie Byrd's 5-year-old daughter was scheduled to undergo her fourth surgery in 13 months earlier this morning. Please take a moment out of your busy day to pray for Lorie's little girl and her whole family.

Thank you.

My daughter is undergoing her third surgery to treat cholesteatoma in her ear (and hopefully to replace a hearing bone, if all goes well) this morning at 7:15. This is actually her fourth surgery in 13 months (three for cholesteatoma and one for ear tubes) and is her ninth in her five-year-old life. We will need to leave the house at 5:30 to get to the hospital on time, so this will be the last post from me for a while. I should be home Thursday, but probably won’t be blogging again until Friday morning.

I am writing this not only to explain my absence, but to ask for your prayers and well wishes. I cannot tell you how much it has meant to me to know that so many of you were praying for my family over the past 13 months when this latest ordeal began. You would think that after so many times, this would get easier, but trust me, it doesn’t. Thank you for the support you have provided through your prayers and kind comments and emails.

UPDATE: Good news! Lorie found a spare moment to post a comment in her own thread from the hospital.

I won’t be blogging for a while, but am taking advantage of the free hospital internet to update. My daughter is sleeping now and has been most of the day. When she first awoke she was a bit sick and in some pain, but by early evening was her old self – groggy, but herself. Hopefully she will not be up all night since the IV will have to stay in until morning.

Her surgery was long, but was a great success. The cholesteatoma had not recurred – something that surprised us and the doctor, since it was so pervasive in the past two surgeries. That allowed the doctor to replace the hearing bone (I don’t remember the name of which one) with a prosthesis. There was some scar tissue present, but other than that this was the best outcome we could have imagined.

After the ear has healed from surgery, she should have regained much of her hearing and will be able to splash and swim with the other kids for the first time in two years.

Thanks to everyone for your prayers and well wishes. It was very comforting to know that so many prayers were being offered on her behalf. I should be back Friday. Thanks again.

Never underestimate the power of prayer! Keep it up folks, let's pray that this little girl's troubles are finally behind her!

From the "No, You Really Can't Make This Stuff Up" Dept.:

By now, I am certain that most everyone has heard the sad tale of Timken High School in Canton, Ohio, where 65 out of 490 female students are... well... in a family way.

But the absolute coup de grace to this story is something everyone I have seen cover it thus far has missed!

Are you ready for this?

What do you think the nickname is for the Timken High School sports teams?

Go on, take a guess!

No... it couldn't be! It's just not possible!

But, alas, it really and truly is...

The Timken Trojans!

And now, as Paul Harvey would say, you know the rest of the story!

Yes, folks, sometimes truth really is stranger than fiction!


For those of you who are dropping by for the first time, welcome! Make yourselves at home!

You might enjoy checking out my latest satire post:
George W. Bush and the Holy Grail

And our current Photo Caption Contest:
Caption This! [The Beards and the Beads Edition]

Hope you enjoy yourself and thanks for visiting The Right Place!


Thanks for the links!

Howie at The Jawa Report
Pat Curley at Brainster's Blog
Basil at Basil's Blog, who has invited us to supper!
John Ruberry at Marathon Pundit
Ace at Ace of Spades HQ [WOW!!!]
Partisan Pundit, who goes far more in-depth on the original story.

This post is featured in:

Hillbilly Carnival at Don Surber

Be certain to drop by and check out more of the great posts linked to by this wonderful event!

The Fat of the Land

Some food for thought:

About 24.5 percent of American adults are obese, the report said, and in 12 states more than a quarter of all adults are obese, Mississippi, Alabama, West Virginia, Louisiana, Tennessee, Arkansas, Texas, Michigan, Kentucky, Indiana, Ohio and South Carolina.

The states with the smallest percentage of obese adults are Colorado, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Connecticut, Vermont and Montana. (One state, Hawaii, was not ranked.)

Maybe the upside of these high gas prices is that people will walk more. They can't afford to drive!

Speaking of gas prices, this site might be useful reading before you gas up.

Happy Days Are Here Again?

David Frum:

There is great nostalgia on the American left today for the antiwar movements of the 1960s. Leftists now in their 60s remember the marches, the cheering, and of course the sex. What they forget is that it was the reaction against the riots and the protests of the 1960s that delivered the White House to the Republicans for 20 of the 24 years from 1968 until 1992.

Today an even more extremist antiwar movement is again beckoning to the Democratic party. Some Democrats are listening: It looks as if Ohio Democrats will run the violently antiwar Paul Hackett as their candidate in that state’s 2006 Senate race. Wisconsin Senator Russell Feingold is planning to run an antiwar campaign for the Democratic presidential nomination in 2008.

But the leaders of the national party--Bill and Hillary Clinton, Senate Majority Harry Reid, and others--are resisting. They have seen this movie before--and they know how it ends: with the Democrats marginalized and the Republicans back in power.

Pat Buchanan:

In June, I ventured a prediction: "A Eugene McCarthy will appear soon to pressure and challenge Hillary Clinton in 2008, if Hillary does not convert herself into an antiwar candidate ..."

Observing the Cindy Sheehan protest, I updated the prediction just last week: "September could see the coalescing of an antiwar movement that ... divides (the) Democratic Party ..." And so it has come to pass.

On Sunday's "Meet the Press," Gene McCarthy emerged in the person of Sen. Russ Feingold of Wisconsin. Monday, the top headline in The Washington Post read, "Democrats Split Over Position on Iraq War." The opening paragraph:

"Democrats say a longstanding rift in the party over the Iraq war has grown increasingly raw in recent days, as stay-the-course elected leaders who voted for the war three years ago confront rising impatience from activists and strategists who want to challenge President Bush aggressively to withdraw troops."

The DLC strategy of running to the center in 2008 is on a collision course with the wing of the Democratic party. I see a train wreck up ahead.

Happy Days Are Hear Again?

Somehow, I managed to miss the Barbra Streisand/Barry Gibb collaboration Guilty, that was released 25 years ago. But no such luck now, thanks to the Internet. They've come up an update, Guilty Pleasures, that will be released on September 20. Among the cuts is Streisand's anti-war song, Stranger in a Strange Land. You can hear it here.

Seems that I've heard that title before. Maybe some of you lawyers out there should contact the Robert Heinlein estate.

UPDATE: Streisand isn't the only diva who's come out of retirement to bash the war. Joan Baez snagged a gig at Camp Casey.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Straw Poll Time...

At Patrick Ruffini's blog...

August Straw Poll: The Big One

He's tracking results by blog, and this is our first time participating (not enough readers before now)! Please help put us on the blogosphere map by clicking through the above link and voicing your choice for the GOP Presidential Nominee for 2008!

And thank you for your support!

h/t - Lorie Byrd at PoliPundit


UPDATE 8/26:

The Results are in...

The Big One: Results & Analysis

Thank you to all who participated!

Monday, August 22, 2005

Just Wanted to Mention...

If you are not already reading Michelle Malkin on a regular basis, you are really missing out on one of the finest blogs on the Internet!

Mrs. Malkin is presently off on a well-deserved mini-vacation, but, in her place, she has four guest bloggers, all of whom are terrific and deserve congratulations on landing a very pretigious guest blogging gig!

Lorie Byrd should, of course, be very familiar with regular readers of this blog. She is my own personal blogosphere angel! You can catch her regularly at my favorite hangout, PoliPundit as well as at her own fine blog, Byrd Droppings.

Betsy Newmark is another regular stop for me at Betsy's Page. She, like Michelle and Lorie, is one of the best bloggers in the game! Besides that, she just Malkinized me! Wow! Thanks, Betsy!

Brian Maloney of Radio Equalizer is a recent find for me. He has earned his stripes by bringing the Air America scandal to light and by refusing to let go of the story like a raging put bull on a piece of raw meat! He's an excellent example of exactly what we need more of in the blogosphere and what is, sadly, sorely lacking in the Mainstream Media nowadays!

Bryan Preston is another A-list blogger from Junk Yard Blog, who is certain to gain stature and a well-deserved wider audience with this great gig!

Congratulations one and all!

And to all of my readers, please be certain to check out their fine work at Michelle's blog as well as at their own great blogs! You'll be glad that you did!

Funny Stuff: The Fatalistic Four and More!

Pat Curley at Brainster's Blog, who is a comic book fanatic of the first magnitude, has produced a hillarous spoof:

What If... The Rest of the Fantastic Four Were Peaceniks?

If you haven't yet seen this masterpiece from John at WuzzaDem, you have to go check it out:

By Power Possessed (A Blog Noir Tale)

Buckley F. Williams at The Nose on Your Face is routinely one of the funniest guys on the Internet. Case in point:

Evan Cohen To Critics: "He's Only Mostly Dead"

The Evil Emperor Mindstation at Point Five feels liberated:

New Study Allows Point Five To Report Irresponsibly

Hoodlumman at File It Under... has a helpful "Mother Sheehan" flowchart:

A Handy Tool

Speaking of "Mother Sheehan," here's the post that got The Therapist banned by HuffPo:

Cindy Sheehan To Oppose Fur, Smelting, Alchemy, Cholesterol, Clear-Cutting, Parental Notification, Acid Reflux, Daylight Savings Time And Litter

Ahhh... but revenge can be sweet, no?:

Great, Now I Need A Surrogate Peace Mother

And, for those of you who find yourself caught in a gasoline budget cruch, spacemonkey has some ideas over at IMAO:

It's a Gas Gas Gas.

Of course, there's always some homegrown fun right here at The Right Place, too:

George W. Bush and the Holy Grail

Caption This! [The Beards and the Beads Edition]


George W. Bush and the Holy Grail

And now for something completely different...


[Exterior - Day, Washington, D.C.]

(Mist swirls about. Hoofbeats can be heard in the distance, growing closer. Out of the mist, drives a limo, surrounded by several Secret Service Agents, each of whom is banging two hollowed out half-coconut shells together, for apparently no reason other than to make horsey clip-clop noises. The coconut banging ceases with a flourish as the limo comes to a stop in the street, blocked by protesters. We can see the U.S. Capitol in the distance, beyond the protestors. The window rolls down, President George W. Bush leans his head out.)

BUSH: Excuse me, Miss...

HIPPIE: (Carrying a badly misspelled sign about "Fashizm" and reeking of b.o. and hemp.) I'm a man, Man!

BUSH: Oh, sorry about that, it's the long hair... look I really need to get to the Capitol, do you think maybe you and your friends could get out of the street?

HIPPIE: I'm only like 54, man! I'm not old!

BUSH: I never said you were... look, there's a war on and I need to...

HIPPIE: Did you say a war, Man? Not while my generation's alive! The sixties will never die! You can't make 'em die!

BUSH: Look, I didn't want the war, we were attacked by terrorists...

HIPPIE: I know all about your war, Man! It's all about oil! And you lied! You're like, evil and stuff, you Nazi pig!

BUSH: What are you talking about?

HIPPIE: You think other countries are inferior and stuff, so you treat 'em like your slaves, Man! Well, they don't have to take that from you! And besides, you didn't get permission from the French!

FRENCHMAN: 'Allo? Whoo is thees?

BUSH: Hello, sir! I am President Bush, and I urgently need to get to the Capitol! Can you please move along out of the street...

FRENCHMAN: Of course not, you imperialist pig! Go boil your bottom, you son of a silly person! I blow my nose on you, you empty-headed food-trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time! (Walks away.)

BUSH: Look, folks, I am sorry if I did or said anything to offend you, but I'm the President and I need to get to the Capitol...

HIPPIE: Oh, real nice. President, huh! So you've got a real nice mansion and cool threads and stuff. And how d'you get that? By exploiting the workers, Man! By jiving us with your imperialist dogma which perpetuates the social and economic injustices in our society!

FEMINIST: (To Hippie.) Hey, Pigpen! There's some great acid over here... (Looks up at President Bush.) Oh! It's you! (Spits on the ground in disgust.)

BUSH: How do you do ma'am? I was wondering if you and your friends would be so kind as to...

FEMINIST: Don't you "ma'am" me, you sexist pig! Who do you think you are???

BUSH: I'm the President of the United States. Now, if you would be so kind as to...

FEMINIST: Well, you ain't my President! I never voted for you, and neither did anybody else here! Selected not elected!!!

CROWD: (Chanting.) Selected not elected!!! Selected not elected!!! Selected not elected!!!...

BUSH: Excuse me...

CROWD: (Chanting.) Selected not elected!!! Selected not elected!!! Selected not elected!!!...

BUSH: (Retrieves a bullhorn from inside the limo and begins speaking with it.) My fellow Americans, may I have your attention for a moment, please? (Chanting goes on as he continues to speak through the aid of the bullhorn.) I have urgent business to attend to at the Capitol! There are evil people who want to kill us all and end our way of life, and I'm trying to stop them! Now, you don't have to help, but could y'all please just get out of the way?

(Chanting continues in background. President Bush continues to need bullhorn to be heard as the scene continues...)

HIPPIE: You ain't our President man, we didn't vote for you!

BUSH: I won the election!

FEMINIST: We demand a recount!

BUSH: We had 2 recounts, I won them both!

FEMINIST: Then keep counting until the other guy wins!

(Crowd cheers approvingly, then continues chanting.)

BUSH: Look, the Supreme Court...

HIPPIE: No! You look, Man! A bunch of freaks in black robes stepping in and stopping the endless recounts of dubious ballots in cherry-picked counties and thereby foiling our efforts to change the results of an election that didn't turn out the way we wanted it to, is no basis for a government, Man! Now... when the courts make up laws that we like out of whole cloth with no basis whatsoever in the Constitution, that's just groovy, Dude! But when we don't get our way, that's bogus!!! Help! We're being repressed!!!

(President Bush rolls up the window.)

BUSH: Driver, could you just find another route, please?



[Steps of Capitol Hill - Day]

(President Bush and numerous Republican members of Congress and the Administration walk up the steps and are stopped at the entrance by the imposing figure of Sir Daschardt, "The Black Knight", adorned in shimmering black medieval armor.)

BUSH: Good morning, Sir!

DASCHARDT: (Drawing his mighty broadsword.) Halt! Who goes there?

BUSH: It's just me, President Bush! Look, if you've got a few minutes I'd like to meet with you and some of the others to work on a new legislative agenda...

DASCHARDT: Nothing shall pass!

BUSH: Look, I came here to be a uniter, not a divider! And there's a war going on! If you'd only give me the chance, I'm sure we could work together for the good of the American people...

DASCHARDT: Nothing shall pass!

BUSH: Well, I'm sorry you feel that way...

DASCHARDT: Your Administration shall wither and die!!!

(Sir Karl Rove steps forward, drawing his sword.)

ROVE: Let me take care of this, Mr. President!

(Daschardt and Rove clash in a furious sword battle for several minutes, then, with a keen stroke, Rove lops off Daschardt's left arm at the shoulder.)

ROVE: You fought well, brave adversary, now stand aside!

DASCHARDT: 'Tis but a scratch!

ROVE: A scratch? We've taken the House of Representatives from you!

DASCHARDT: No, you haven't!

ROVE: Actually, we took it back in 1994, but for the purposes of this sketch, it is represented by the symbolically severed arm on the ground over there!

DASCHARDT: My party's had worse!

ROVE: Liar!

DASCHARDT: Have at you!

(The battle begins anew. Rove severs Daschardt's right arm in short order.)

ROVE: Victory is ours! We have now taken back the Senate, which you had stolen from us without the benefit of an election! Now that we have lopped off both Houses of Congress, you have no arms left, stand aside!

DASCHARDT: Not so fast!

(Daschardt runs over and begins kicking President Bush with his left leg.)

ROVE: This is ludicrous, you have no arms!

DASCHARDT: It's just a flesh wound! Our party is invincible!

(Daschardt kicks Bush repeatedly.)

ROVE: Stop that! Look, I'm warning you...

DASCHARDT: (To Bush, still kicking him.) Filibuster! Obstruction! Filibuster! Obstruction! Had enough, yet?

ROVE: You're a looney! Haven't you heard there's a war on? We haven't got time for this!

(Rove chops both of Daschardt's legs out from under him, leaving him a limbless torso on the Capitol steps.)

ROVE: Right! Now we've had YOU voted out of office, won popular re-election by several million votes, and increased our advantage in both Houses of Congress! You're finished! (Sheaths his sword and turns away.)

(President Bush, Sir Karl, and the rest of the entourage proceed past the helpless Sir Daschardt into the Capitol.)

DASCHARDT: I'm not licked yet! Come back and fight me, you sissies! I'll bite your kneecaps off! You stole the election again, I saw you steal it! I demand a recount!!! There are thousands of dead Sioux who are being disenfranchised in South Dakota alone!!!



[Halls of the Capitol - Day]

BUSH: (To his entourage as they walk through the hallway, towards the Capitol Rotunda.) Thank God that's over with, now maybe we can finally get something done!

(Suddenly, standing before them, blocking their way, is the entire Democratic Caucus and their Party Chairman, Howard Dean.)

BUSH: Howdy, folks! Glad you're all here, listen if we could just talk about some of what we need to do for the country...

DEMOCRATS: (In unision.) Nay!

DEAN: We are the Knuts Who Say "Nay!" and we shall say "Nay!" to you, until you appease us!

BUSH: Alright, then, perhaps we can work something out. What is it that you want?

DEAN: It's not what we want that matters, for we have no positive agenda! It's what we don't want that matters!

BUSH: Alright, then, what is it that you don't want?

DEAN: We don't want our President to be... a shrubbery!

BUSH: Come again?

DEMOCRATS: (In unision.) Nay! Nay! Nay! Nay! Nay! Nay!...

BUSH: Alright! Alright! I just don't understand what it is that you folks want?

DEAN: Whatever you want, we don't want it! Whatever you propose, we are against it! Whatever you say, we will argue with you and call you names simply for the sake of being opposed!

BUSH: What does that accomplish?

DEAN: Nothing, but it makes us feel good! Yeeeeaaarrrrggghhhhh!!!

DEMOCRATS: (In unision.) Nay! Nay! Nay! Nay! Nay! Nay!...

(President Bush turns to the Republican Senators for help, but many of them are running in circles, cupping their hands over their ears.)

BUSH: Why are they all doing that?

VICE PRESIDENT CHENEY: Well, Mr. President, the Senate is not like the House. A lot of the Republicans over there, well... they're a bunch of pantywaists, to be frank with you! They're afraid of the Knuts Who Say "Nay!"

BUSH: What can we do?

CHENEY: Well, I suppose we'll just have to discuss using... (Whispers into the President's ear.)

BUSH: (Repeating the whispered term aloud.) The Noo-kyu-luhr Option?

(The Democrats all immediately stop yelling "Nay!" and audibly gasp in unision.)

DEAN: Stop saying that word!

BUSH: What word?

DEAN: The word we cannot bear to hear because you mangle it so!

BUSH: You mean "noo-kyu-luhr"?

(The Democrats all gasp again.)

DEAN: Stop saying it!

BUSH: Noo-kyu-luhr! Noo-kyu-luhr! Noo-kyu-luhr! Noo-kyu-luhr! Noo-kyu-luhr!...

(The Democrats all begin screaming in terror, while rolling around on the floor, covering their ears.)

BUSH: Great idea, Dick! It worked like a charm! Now, quickly... let's get some things done around here before they come to their senses!



If you've enjoyed this post, you may also enjoy...

My Latest Creation:
The U.S. Constitution - A Liberal Interpretation

More Political Satire:
The 9/11 Commission, Part 2 - Electric Boogaloo
Democrats Give up on Winning, Push for More "Spectacular" Losses
We Now Join the "Save Air America Radio" Telethon, Already in Progress...
Top Secret Democrat Party Strategy Meeting - Exposed!
The Far-Left's Favorite Soap Opera: Get Bush!
You Just Might Be a Moonbat...
Selections from the "Donktionary"
The Moonbat Song

The Hill-Orgy of Errors:
Hillary Clinton's Secret Love Affair Exposed!
Bigfoot Takes His Own Life!
The Right Place Stands By Its Story!

And a Filthy Lie:
Glenn Reynolds Copyrights the Word "Indeed," Threatens to Bill Much of Blogosphere Right out of Existence!

Or feel free to check out our Main Page. Thank you for visiting The Right Place!


Thanks for the links!

Pat Curley at Brainster's Blog
Betsy Newmark, guest-blogging at Michelle Malkin
Don Surber at Don Surber
Giacomo at Joust the Facts
Poca Dot at It'sAPundit
Gullyborg at Resistance Is Futile!
Bruce the Human Pet at Conservative Cat

A very special thank you to The Anchoress, who has been doing more linking than blogging the last few days, for reasons that become obvious if you read her blog. Please keep her and her family in your thoughts and prayers.

AJ Strata at The Strata-Sphere
Oregano at Cafe Oregano
Kitty Myers at Lifelike Pundits
Isaac Schrödinger at Isaac Schrödinger
Charles at DND, Law School, and Life
Brad Warbiany at The Unrepentant Individual
Daniel at Random Thoughts of a Confessional Lutheran
Dan Melson at Searchlight Crusade

This post is featured in:

Carnival of the Clueless #11 at Right Wing Nut House
Carnival of the Vanities #153 at The Big Picture
Carnival of Comedy #17 at The Conservative UAW Guy
Carnival of the Insanities at Dr. Sanity

Be certain to drop by and check out more of the great posts linked to by these wonderful events!

This post has been nominated for non-council post of the week by Watcher of Weasels!

Living in the Past

Krugman’s Big Lie, by Richard Baehr

Paul Krugman, the former Enron advisor, New York Times op ed columnist, and presumably in his spare time, “educator” at Princeton, has made a habit of distortion, and half truths in his twice-weekly columns in the “paper of record.” Several website have sprung up to deconstruct each Krugman column,and others respond to specific errors, which are routine. But Krugman’s column on Friday, August 19 marks a remarkable descent into outright dishonesty, a new low. What is most astounding is that the dishonesty involves Krugman’s deliberately mistaken interpretration of a study in which his own paper, the New York Times, was a participant, and from which the Times ‘ reporters drew entirely different conclusions from those which Krugman trumpeted in his article.

Krugman’s dishonesty involves the results of the Florida vote in the Presidential election in 2000. In his column titled: ”What They Did Last Fall”, Krugman says the following about the 2000 race:

“Two different news media consortiums reviewed Florida’s ballots; both found that a full manual recount would have given the election to Mr. Gore”.

Quite simply, his statement is false. It is a lie.

Poor Paul Krugman. Life is so cruel outside of the "reality-based" community:

Al Gore Is Still President.

According to Quantum physics, every possiblity actually occurs in a different dimension. For example, if you come to a fork in the road and you go right, in another quantum reality another version of you goes left.

So, if the theory holds.

In another quantum reality, there is a nation full of Happy free people who have just reelected Al Gore to another 4 years.

9/11 didnt happen. No Iraq war. No Abu Gharib. Bush is still a 2 bit govenor down in Texas.

Or if you prefer, in another quantum reality, Kerry is getting settled into his office after roundly defeating Bush.

Bush has been indicted on war crimes and proof of election fraud has been uncovered. Jobs on the increase, the stock market is rising and the troops are all coming home this weekend.

DAMN. I am sure am jealous of those folks in these other Quantum realitys

The best response that I can think of to all this foolishness is in the lyrics of a song by Jethro Tull:

Oh, we won’t give in,
We’ll keep living in the past.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Trained Seals

From yesterday's OpinionJournal:

It's too bad there's now a firewall in place on the computer system used by the Senate Judiciary Committee's Democratic staff. We'd love to take a peek at the internal memos reacting to Tuesday's Washington Post story headlined "Roberts Unlikely to Face Big Fight; Many Democrats See Battle as Futile."

If the staff memos that were leaked on President Bush's appeals-court nominees in 2003 are any guide, Democrats once again are taking dictation from liberal interest groups--this time on how to oppose Supreme Court nominee John Roberts. We expect Tuesday's e-chatter went along the lines of: "Ralph Neas called . . ." and "Nan Aron wants . . ." In case you doubt us, we refer you to Wednesday's follow-up story in the Post, headlined "Democrats Feel Heat From Left on Roberts; Groups Say Fight Should Be Stronger."

It's no news flash that organizations like the Alliance for Justice, People for the American Way and are influencing Democrats' attack on Judge Roberts. But the rapidity with which Senators Pat Leahy and Ted Kennedy jumped this week to follow the groups' orders is nonetheless remarkable, and politically revealing.

Within hours of publication of the first Post story, Mr. Leahy hit the barricades with a statement calling Judge Roberts "an eager and aggressive advocate" of policies "deeply tinged with the ideology of the far right wing of his party." During the Reagan years, the Senator added, the nominee held views "that were among the most radical being offered by a cadre intent on reversing decades of policies on civil rights, voting rights, women's rights, privacy, and access to justice." At least he didn't call Judge Roberts a member of the Taliban.

As for Senator Kennedy, he sent a letter to colleagues claiming the Reagan documents show that Judge Roberts "was on or beyond the outer fringe of that extreme group eager to take our law and society back in time on a wide range of issues of individual rights and liberties."

As noted by in an earlier post, the Democratic party is becoming increasingly dominated by its Moveon.Org wing. How long can they remain a viable national party with that albatross around their neck?

Some Help at the Pump?

Steve Chapman:

Gas prices are high because crude oil has been selling for upwards of $60 a barrel. But that price fortunately looks as transient as a summer romance.

The going rate has been pushed up in the last couple of years by rising fuel consumption. But Michael Lynch, president of Strategic Energy and Economic Research Inc., says global demand has fallen short of predictions this year. Not only that, but crude oil inventories have been expanding in the U.S., which should help push prices down.

It could be argued that the high price of oil has dampened glogal demand. Certainly, everyone I'm acquainted with has cut back on discretionary driving. Chapman agrees:

It turns out the law of supply and demand has not been repealed: When the price of oil rises, people consume less than they would otherwise. The longer oil remains expensive, the more people will look for ways to conserve it. Already, car buyers are flocking to gas-stingy hybrids, which were once regarded as the equivalent of living in a yurt.

Well, before you trade in your Escalade for a Prius, listen up:

Why? Because aside from dampening demand, high prices have served the other useful function assigned to them by economics textbooks: boosting supply. Oil producers, spurred by the lure of big profits, have been investing like mad in new sources.

"Significant new capacity will be coming onstream -- much of it launched a few years ago on price assumptions much lower than today's market prices," according to Daniel Yergin, chairman of Cambridge Energy Research Associates. A recent study by his firm says that, based on investments already made, worldwide output could rise by as much as 20 percent in the next five years. CERA thinks the peak of global production is indeed on the horizon -- but not till after 2020.

Unlike many of my fellow conservatives, I take the position that we should conserve fossil fuels, and look at alternative energy sources, including nuclear. But I also believe in exploration for our own oil reserves as well. Reducing our use of foreign oil as well as boosting our domestic production, combined with using alternatives will make us more energy independent. And stronger as a nation.

UPDATE: Thirdwave tells us that it costs $60 for him top off his Sedan De Ville. Ouch!

On Top of His Game

Mark Steyn:

Yet in the wreckage of Pat and Cindy Sheehan's marriage there is surely a lesson for the Democratic Party. As Cindy says, they're both Democrats, but she's "more liberal" and "more radicalized." There are a lot of less liberal and less radicalized Dems out there: They're soft-left-ish on health care and the environment and education and so forth; many have doubts about the war, but they love their country, they have family in the military, and they don't believe in dishonoring American soldiers to make a political point. The problem for the Democratic Party is that the Cindys are now the loudest voice: Michael Moore, Howard Dean,, and Air America, the flailing liberal radio network distracting attention from its own financial scandals by flying down its afternoon host Randi Rhodes to do her show live from Camp Casey. The last time I heard Miss Rhodes she was urging soldiers called up for Iraq to refuse to go -- i.e., to desert.

On unwatched Sunday talk shows, you can still stumble across the occasional sane, responsible Dem. But, in the absence of any serious intellectual attempt to confront their long-term decline, all the energy on the left is with the fringe. The Democratic Party is a coalition of Pat Sheehans and Cindy Sheehans, and the noisier the Cindys get the more estranged the Pats are likely to feel.

As they say, read the whole thing. Steyn is one of the very best writers on the political scene.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Sympathy For the (Red State) Devils

You don't see much of this in the Old Gray Lady:

CRAWFORD, Texas (AP) -- Things used to be pretty quiet around here -- downright uneventful -- until the new folks moved in about five years ago on a ranch just northwest of town off Prairie Chapel Road.

Then came the dozens of protesters who started camping out near President Bush's ranch this month, led by a California mother who lost her son in the war and insists on speaking to the president. Their reception has been anything but warm.

"I'm a Democrat and proud of it," Keith Lynch, 67, said while taking a break from trimming the brush around the flag pole in front of his 600-acre ranch near the Bush spread. "But you've got to respect your country, you've got to respect your flag, and you've got to respect your president."

My God, a Democrat respecting President Bush? What would the MoveOn.Org crowd say about that?

Lynch and others around the town of 745 people believe that respect hasn't been given amid the protests in Crawford, about 95 miles south of Dallas.

"Like the circus, it needs to pack up and go," said Kim Williams, a 41-year-old mother of two.

Cindy Sheehan did leave Thursday, but for reasons unrelated to the protest. She returned to California to be with her mother, who suffered a stroke, but dozens of her supporters stayed behind in their tent city while Bush continued a monthlong vacation at home.

"They have every right to speak their mind and say their piece, but they've just kind of taken over," Williams said. "I just wish they'd go home. It gets old."

The NY Times should get some credit for printing the article - up until now, coverage of the townspeople of Crawford in the Cindy Sheehan media circus has been restricted to the yahoo who ran over the mock graves at Camp Casey. The article does - for the AP - a surprisingly fair job of depicting ordinary rural folks trying to go through their daily routines despite the intrusion of outsiders. Far from being insular bigots, the Crawford residents recognize the protesters' free speech rights, but would rather get on with their lives.

But it is doubtful that the Times really wants credit for the article. The timing of its release - after 5 PM on a Friday afternoon in summer - is the closest thing to the cover of darkness as you can get in the news industry. The story will run on Saturday buried on page A9 or whatever, and will be forgotten on Monday. Oh, well. One and a half cheers again for a half-assed job by the Times.

(H/T - Alexander K. McClure of PoliPundit)