Wednesday, May 18, 2005

The Right Place Stands By Its Story!

The Right Place would like to take this opportunity to apologize for any role it may have played in the tragic events of yesterday.

However, I would also like to point out that there is absolutely no proof whatsoever that anything posted by me on this site is in any way related to the unfortunate events at Yellowstone Park. There are any number of reasons that Bigfoot may have decided to take his own life, and I deeply resent any implication that myself or this blog had anything to do with it!

If anyone has blood on their hands in this incident, it is clear to me that the blame lies squarely with Senator Clinton's office. They had possession of a copy of the affidavit for a full ten minutes before I ran with the story, and I took the fact that they did not call me to deny anything as proof of its accuracy!

That said, I must now make a small correction to the original story, as my eyewitness can no longer vouch for one of the more minor details. He is no longer certain that it was, in fact, Bigfoot he saw with the Senator and Ms. Stewart that night:

It was dark, my binoculars were fogged up, I suppose it could have been Chewbacca... they sort of look alike. I could have been mistaken. I don't know."

In light of this revelation, the Right Place vows to investigate the matter more thoroughly now that the damage is, seemingly, already done.

I would also like to take this opportunity to dispel a number of rumors that are circulating on the web.

First of all, there is absolutely no truth to the suggestion that I am, in reality, Karl Rove. There is also no truth to the rumor that he is the source of the affidavit nor that he was involved in any way with placing a copy of said affidavit on the desk of Senator Clinton's intern.

Secondly, I can neither confirm, nor deny, that my source for this story is former President Bill Clinton, who was reportedly sighted at the Kinko's in Abilene, Texas at around the same time the affidavit was faxed to me. I can only restate for the record that my source is "unimpeachable"!

Furthermore, I had no idea that Mr. Sasquatch was the leading candidate to run on the Green Party ticket in 2006 against Sen. Conrad Burns (R-MT) and any implication that my publication of the story may have been politically motivated is outrageous!

As an aside to Lorie Byrd of PoliPundit and the guys at Ankle Biting Pundits: "The Sasquatchewan Incident"??? That's the best you can do???

Finally, until someone can come forth with proof positive that this story is false, the Right Place stands by its shoddy reporting. It is not up to me to prove that what I have asserted is true, it is up to all of you to prove, beyond the shadow of any doubt, that I am wrong!

Related Stories:
Hillary Clinton's Secret Love Affair Exposed!
Bigfoot Takes His Own Life!

1 comment:

Pat said...

Good one! Finally got around to linking it today.