Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Halloween Cavalcade of Horrors!

Whatever you do this Halloween, The Right Place would like to warn you to avoid renting or viewing any of the following horror flicks, easily among the worst ever made!

I Know What You Did the Summer Before Last

Stars: Patrick Fitzgerald, Judith Miller, Robert Novak, Lewis Libby, Karl Rove, Joe Wilson, Valerie Plame

Spectres from the past come back to haunt those who couldn't keep a nonexistent secret and some seem sure to "get the hook."

Old Frankenstein

Stars: John Kerry

A crazed madman tries to resurrect a monstrous, lumbering, slow-witted and very, very dead Presidential Campaign and have it run again in the next election.

The Witches of East-ICK!

Stars: Hillary Clinton, Barbara Boxer, Nancy Pelosi

Three nasty, hideous old hags cast their spells on the press and the brain-dead zombies of their far-left army, but can they manage to trick the public into buying the illusion that they are "mainstream"?

Election Night of the Living Dead

Stars: Richard J. Daley Joel Osment

"I see dead people... voting for Democrats!"

Pitch Black

Stars: Dr. Kamau Kambo

He's dreaming of a black Christmas...

Plan 9 from Empty Space

Stars: Markos Moulitsas Zuniga

Perhaps the most inept b-grade horror film ever made. An evil "genius" threatens to make his enemies "radioactive," but in the end, there is no plan!

The Calamityville Horror

Stars: Ray Nagin, Kathleen Blanco, Mary Landrieu, Michael Brown, and thousands of reporters [cameos include: Randall Robinson, Sean Penn, Kanye West, Louis Farrakhan]

Tales of racism, conspiracy, rape, murder, cannibalism and 10,000 bodies floating in the streets of New Orleans in the wake of a natural disaster turn out to be mass (media) hallucinations.

The Texas Hacksaw Massacre II

Stars: Ronnie Earle, Tom DeLay

An insanely partisan prosecutor stalks a wily politician with a killer smile using a half-assed indictment. Sequel to a failed film from several years ago featuring Earle chasing Kay Bailey Hutchinson around in much the same way. More comedy than horror.

The Brain Dead Zone

Stars: The Democratic Underground

Thousands of people become trapped in a terrifying fantasy world of paranoid conspiracy-theories of their own creation with little hope of escape.

The Incredible Shrinking Nomination

Stars: George W. Bush, Harriet Miers

A President nominates a woman for the Supreme Court only to see his approval ratings and her chances at confirmation shrink at an alarming rate. Can he save himself from his angry base and rescue her foundering nomination at the same time?

A Native-American Werewolf in Boulder

Stars: Ward Churchill

A self-loathing anarchist pretending to be of American Indian descent curses a series of mind-numbingly stupid college campuses with his presence.

The Blob

Stars: Michael Moore

The world's tubbiest nincompoop devours everything in sight and belches forth nauseating propaganda, leaving a trail of slimy ooze everywhere he goes.

The Blair Ditch Project

Stars: Cindy Sheehan, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, David Duke, A.N.S.W.E.R.

A wigged-out hippie loses her heroic son to a war and accuses the President and the Jews of plotting his murder. Embraced by an odd assortment of Anti-American elements, she becomes an obsessed stalker of any camera or microphone she can find. A movie with no underlying plot that meanders on forever without end.

Invasion of the Body Count Snatchers

Stars: The Media, Left-Wing Bloggers

A ghoulish countdown ends with gleeful opportunists trying to make political hay out of 2000 dead soldiers.

The Fall of the House of Loser

Stars: Al Gore, Dimpled Chad

After losing the closest and most bitterly contested Presidential Election in American history, a former Vice-President goes stark raving mad and takes most of the political left with him as he implodes.


Stars: Howard Dean

In Iowa, everyone can hear you scream!


UPDATE 10/30:

Welcome Michelle Malkin and Dr. Sanity readers and everyone from everywhere!

Be certain to join us here at The Right Place for a very special Halloween masquerade ball featuring several very special guest bloggers (in disguise) as they help us celebrate our First Blogiversary! The fun begins after 6pm EST tonight and runs all day tomorrow!

Happy Halloween!


If you've enjoyed this post, you may also enjoy...

More Political Satire:
Ronnie Earle Indicts Much of Texas on Conspiracy Charges
U.S. Declares War on Smurfs, Hundreds Dead in "Shock and Awe" Style Carpet-Bombing Campaign
Angry Protesters Demand "U.S. Out of U.S. Now!"
New Orleans Rhapsody
Cindy Sheehan Files Suit Against God; President Bush, Israel Named as "Co-Conspirators"
The U.S. Constitution - A Liberal Interpretation
George W. Bush and the Holy Grail
The 9/11 Commission, Part 2 - Electric Boogaloo
Democrats Give up on Winning, Push for More "Spectacular" Losses
We Now Join the "Save Air America Radio" Telethon, Already in Progress...
Top Secret Democrat Party Strategy Meeting - Exposed!
The Far-Left's Favorite Soap Opera: Get Bush!
You Just Might Be a Moonbat...
Selections from the "Donktionary"
The Moonbat Song

The Hill-Orgy of Errors:
Hillary Clinton's Secret Love Affair Exposed!
Bigfoot Takes His Own Life!
The Right Place Stands By Its Story!

And a Filthy Lie:
Glenn Reynolds Copyrights the Word "Indeed," Threatens to Bill Much of Blogosphere Right out of Existence!

Or feel free to check out our Main Page or our latest Photo Caption Contest. Thank you for visiting The Right Place!


Thanks for the links!

Lorie Byrd at PoliPundit, who offers an appropriate picture, and whom I should have credited earlier for inspiring this post with a post of her own at Byrd Droppings, which asks people for their picks for the Best Horror Flicks of All-Time. Be certain to pop over and help her out!

Bruce the Human Pet at The Conservative Cat
Mister Snitch!
Gary at Ex-Donkey Blog
scipio62 at Scipio the Metalcon
Hoodlumman at File It Under... (Oooh! An Über-Funnel!)
DWB at The Mighty Righty [Check out the Frankenkerry photoshops!]
Isaac Schrödinger
Mrs. Greyhawk at Mudville Gazette
Romeocat at CatHouse Chat
Kitty at Kitty Litter
Michelle Malkin (WOW!)
Stickwick Stapers at Carnaby Fudge
Mr. Lee at Lobbying DC
LindaSoG at Something... and Half of Something
Hatless in Hattiesburg

This post is proudly featured in...

Carnival of Satire #6 at The Skwib
Carnival of Comedy #26 at Shoot a Liberal
Carnival of the Clueless #19 at Right Wing Nut House
Carnival of the Insanities at Dr. Sanity (Special Halloween Edition!)
Carnival of Crazy IX at File It Under...

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